Eggplant Issues

Legally Kidnapped

2012-02-15T11:21:00.001-08:00

It’s been 4 months since the girls left. Plenty of time to get over it! I felt that it was time to write this.

This post isn’t about assigning blame, pointing the finger at who caused this tragedy, because ultimately I know God is in control and nothing slips through His fingers (although certain names now makes me cringe upon hearing it because of the role they took in the way this played out).

Instead, I want to ‘vocalize’ the thoughts that have been swirling around in my mind for 4 months in an effort to show people reality and hope that in the future someone may understand a bit better what a foster parent goes through.

The girls came to us as a foster placement, meaning the goal was for them to return to their mom. We understood that and supported it in the best ways we could.

At some point though, adoption started being talked about because it did not seem likely they could indeed ever return home, and there were no suitable relatives. Their two sisters lived with a great aunt who did a mostly adequate job of caring for them, but was in no position to have all four of them and at no point showed interest.

When you are parenting a foster child, the goal is to help them heal, help them properly grieve their losses, help them learn the things they haven’t yet, and prepare them for when they go home.

But when things change and the plan starts for the children to have permanency with their foster parent, the whole concept of the family changes. Instead of how to help them while they’re here temporarily, it becomes, how to help them thrive in this family. Plans for the future begin and the delicate talks of them not returning home start happening.

The silly little one had a birthday on October 15. We spent the afternoon at Freddy Hill Farms finding our way through corn maize’s, and riding up to the pumpkin patch to pick the perfectly orange, round pumpkin. We colored buttons and watched pig races. It was our last family day we’d have together.

Since this post isn’t about the details per say, I’ll summarize to say that the time we had with the girls had high points and low points. But even in the low points we loved them, and the low points concreted for us that we wanted to be a family, for better or for worse.

Tantrums were frequent and difficult behaviors and outrages were the norm.
On October 18th, after a long tantrum by the older one, we called for help. One thing lead to another, and the next thing I know the social worker (not our normal one, she was out of the country) shows up, barging in our home as if she’s the protector for the innocent, and says she’s taking the girls to respite. Little did I know as that point, my tantruming child again made a false allegation when she saw the social worker outside (perhaps coerced or encouraged by the naive social worker), and that this would be the last time I would see them.

After a moment of trying to get the misunderstanding and somewhat antagonistic social worker to understand what was going on, and that this was typical behavior and control mechanisms (for her to cry wolf), I packed up a few days’ worth of cloths. Having already been through several investigations, I knew it may be a day or so before they came home.

Days turned into a week. Their pumpkins on the front porch started to rot. I cleaned their room over and over and washed all their sheets, blankets and comforters so everything would be clean when they got home. We had no idea what was going on. We were being told they might not return home. In desperation I called the State Worker who was to investigate and pleaded with her to perform the investigation quickly so they could come home. She obliged, schedule us to come to the office that very day, and after talking for about an hour, she assured us we were fine and said she hoped we could continue helping the girls once they came home.

But the agency said they weren’t coming home. They were changing their placement. We frantically scored the internet for laws and regulations concerning foster parent rights. We consulted lawyers, polled anyone we could think of that could shed light on this. I talked to supervisors of all our workers even working my way up to the assistant to the city’s commissioner.

It turned out the placement could not be changed without a hearing in front of a judge who would hear us out and make a decision. There was supposed to be due process and because they had been with us so long, we could appeal the move. We wrote letters, we prayed and prayed, and hoped the judge would listen. We waited to find out when the court date would be.

One day the call came. Instead of following the law which would allow us to be heard, they instead had an administrative hearing and the judge signed off for the placement to be changed, they would permanently be moved from our home and live with their sisters and great aunt. That night at dinner, we had to tell the other children that it was over, and the girls would not be coming home. It was the worst conversation I've ever had, it was maybe the hardest parenting moment. Part of me didn't want to tell them, let them keep hoping. And as we sat and cried I had to tell them it would be ok, and I had to convince myself that it was true too.

From beginning to end, it was 4 weeks. 4 weeks of hoping they’d come back, 4 weeks of researching and frantically trying to find a way they could come home. But in the end we lost. In some ways it’s easy to say, “They get to live with their sisters now so it’s ok”, but really that’s not the best thing.

At first I felt confident they’d be home after a few days. It didn’t seem logical that God would have brought us so far, given us these girls, only to take them. There’s no way that could be what He’d have happen. But slowly my confident fell. We started falling into despair.

Week after week we would think we were at the end, but then find a new possibility, someone would suggest something to try, and we’d have hope. Towards the end we were truly grasping at straws, but John and I are not ones to give up easily. We had to do everything we could so that there would never be any question.

During the 4 weeks I sometimes think of as the ‘black hole’ we continued with our life the best we could. I don’t have a job that can be called out of, but I walked around in a daze. I remember one day soon after the girls left walking around in a neighborhood. It was foggy and lightly drizzling. Behind the neighborhood is a cemetery and that day there was an internment; playing beside the coffin was a bagpiper. The long moans, the low sad notes of the bagpipe and the dreary weather perfectly matched my heavy heart.

For weeks I was involuntarily drawn to wearing dark colors, black and grey. Everyday felt like a funeral. Day after day, around 6pm I would realize that I had not eaten one single crumb of food. Not one bite. My appetite was gone, my girls were gone. When I wasn’t working, I was laying on the couch. The kids played around me, I suppose not doing anything too dangerous.
Dinner for the kids was chicken nuggets or hotdogs. I couldn’t cook, couldn’t do much of anything. Thinking back, I should have asked someone to bring some meals for the kids at least and recognized that I simply could not. Truthfully, I’m not sure how we got anything done at all. I was dragging, barely able to keep up with my own grief, let alone try to help my kids.

Everything felt different. We thought of all we’d lost. We packed up all their things, lovingly placing them in boxes. We cried over all we’d miss out on with them gone, all they’d miss out on. No more Awana, no more gymnastics, no more brothers, no more mommy and daddy, no more pets. I could barely stand the thought of them being sad, and wishing they were home. Even now it grieves me greatly to think of them sad. I wish I could run to them and say it’s ok now, we’ll be together.

For weeks I sobbed my way through the days. I just couldn’t believe they were gone. They were my “girlies”. That was my love name for them. Shayla is “Goose”, Elliott is “Chubs”, and they were “Girlie”. When I'd pick them up from somewhere I'd say, "You ready girlie?".

Every day I would talk to my mom and sister, even when there were no updates. I’d cry and cry, and even though they knew all I’d do on the phone was cry, they still answered every time. My family was priceless during this time.

The thing with foster care is that there really isn’t much caring. People who care the least, have the most say in decisions.

For the DHS worker, he was finally getting rid of us. For 2 years we disagreed with most of the things he did, which were unprofessional and outright blatant misconduct. For our agency and the social workers, they were just doing what they had to do which is to keep their contract by supporting DHS’s plan. The judge thought he was doing what was best by putting the girls with their biological sisters. Blood relatives are important, but are not always the best placement. Sometimes I think of it like that and say that we did what foster parents are supposed to do. We cared for them till they could return to family. But my heart knows better.

The best way I can describe it is that they were legally kidnapped. Taken without reason, held from us, leaving us helpless. When people would ask what happened to the girls, where were they, I wanted to scream, "They were kidnapped!", but instead politely explained they lived with their aunt now.

If your children were kidnapped, you’d do whatever the kidnappers asked, provide whatever ransom was requested, and we did everything we could think of. Obliged their every request. But the end for us meant never seeing them again, and it was all done in the name of the law. They were legally kidnapped, taken from their family. There was nothing left for us to do. There were no law officers on our side fighting for us. Instead, it seemed that those involved thought we should just let it go. Get over it.

October 18 was the last time we saw them. The agency never followed through on setting up a ‘goodbye’ visit. I still wish I had known it would be our last time, although I’m not sure what we would have done differently. I have to believe that we loved them the best we could for almost 2 years, and that they’ll remember that.

Having the girls leave has truly been the most terrible thing in my life. Although there haven’t been many, I’ve had heartaches and sadness, but losing children is by far the worst. Some may think that it isn’t that bad, and that I shouldn’t say I’ve lost my kids, because they didn’t die.

But for me, it’s worse. They aren’t resting in the arms of Jesus. They are in an environment that is not good, and I can’t keep them safe anymore. They will grow up parentless and most likely the cycle will continue with them. I can’t stop people from hurting them; I can’t guide them to good choices anymore. I can’t remind them of Jesus’s love for them every day. I know where they are and it’s only a short distance, yet am not allowed to see them.

I am thankful though that God protected us from what could have happened. In times of trial, it’s easy to shut down and go into seclusion. I’m so thankful we had a safe place at church, and my family who grieved alongside us. I am thankful for the new friends God gave us who understood as only fellow foster parents can.

God never let us go. He didn’t leave us to fight alone. I know He wasn’t sitting back watching it all play out, but rather, just as I grieved knowing in my heart the sadness of my girls and my other children, I know God’s heart grieved at the loss we endured.

We trust him. It’s easy to think of reasons why maybe God allowed this, but ultimately it isn’t important. Maybe He has children for us that will be an even better fit, or maybe there are children needing a home that not many are willing to give, that we’ll say yes to now that we’ll have the space. We are certain He is sovereign. Our girls were taken, right or wrong, they’re gone. God is in control.

While I pray for myself and for my kids, I pray even more for two little girls who for the 3rd time in their short lives, were moved to a new home, a home they were not born into. I pray for two little girls who will soon be entering formative teenage years, without the attention of a protectant father; without the loving guidance of a mother. Rather they will live under the supervision of a chaperone, having little more than someone yelling for them to get in the house after dark. Someone who will mostly make sure they go to school and throw some frozen fish sticks on the table for dinner, but not nurture and guide in the truths of scripture. I pray God watches over them and protects them and that somehow they’ll remember what they learned about Christ and His love.

At the suggestion of a trusted person, we went to grief counseling a few times to figure out how to sort through what happened. And God, in His sovereignty, provided a counselor who is an ‘expert’ in foster and adoptive issues, because she is a foster and adoptive parent herself! There was so much to muddle through that sometimes I wasn’t even sure what emotion to focus on. Should I be sad, should we just get over it (which kind of seemed like an easier solution)? It was beneficial to glean from her wisdom and the insights she had.

When I think back to those weeks of heartache, sometimes I wish we had just kidnapped the girls and packed up and ran so that no one could take them. I wanted us to be a family, a forever family. But maybe one of the best things that came from it all is our desire to grow our family through adoption and to be a family to children who don’t have anyone fighting for them. God is able to do more than we can ever imagine, and we are confident in His faithfulness. We know He will turn our sorrow into joy, and that even though there are still sad days, He has a purpose.

The Birth Order Excuse

2012-01-31T12:09:00.000-08:00

When you enter the world of foster care and adoption, you start hearing a lot about birth order. If you should rearrange it, if you shouldn’t, not to take children older than your biologically oldest, etc. People love to say, “don’t bring any children into you home who aren’t younger than your youngest.” It’s a blanket statement, said in my opinion, in a kinda ignorant way.

I’m no expert on this subject, but I do have a few things to say about it, and I firmly believe that children should not be left waiting for homes simply because they’d mess up your family’s birth order.

My husband and I had pre-marital counseling before we were married, well, kinda.
Our pastor at the time was going to meet with us and guide us through issues that may arise in our marriage, or that was the plan anyways.

The first week he actually dove into a long soliloquy on birth order and what place you have in your family can determine what birth order a person you want to marry should have. John and I are both 2nd born, but I am the middle child and he is the youngest, I can’t really remember what that meant. Maybe it means we’re a bad fit (he he, I doubt it!).

He loaned us a book called “The Birth Order Connection” by Kevin Leman. To be honest, I think we kinda skimmed it and returned it, and I couldn’t tell you a thing I learned from it. I’m sure Mr. Leman spent years of research and developing theories and he’s probably a very intelligent man. I don’t mean to discredit what he says, I just don’t think it should distract from opening your home to children in need, and I think it might be a bunch of bologna.

Birth order is a weird thing, you have no control over it, and there is all this stuff that supposedly naturally goes along with your birth order and it’s supposed to have a huge impact on who you are as a person.

Recently John and I attended a meeting at an agency where we will Lord willing be adopting children through. During the breakout sessions the infamous comment was made “you don’t want to mess up your kids birth order….don’t take kids older than your biological kids”.

One of my first issues with this thinking is that WHO IS LOOKING OUT FOR THE ORPHAN? No one cares about messing up an orphan’s birth order. Always gotta look out for #1 right? Me and mine. Sigh. What about matching kids in families where their birth order is protected? If it’s such an important deal, why not consider the adopted child’s place?

Here’s what happened when our foster daughters came.
Our oldest was 3. Our middle was almost 2. Our youngest was 3 month old. Our oldest foster daughter was 7…she was the 2nd oldest in her family of 4 girls. The younger foster daughter was 4, she was the baby of her family and automatically became a big sis to 3 other kids. Our oldest became a middle child with 2 older siblings. How’s that for messing up birth order?

No matter what, you’re always messing up birth order. If you take children younger than your youngest, you’re taking away the “baby” status from your youngest child. Our younger foster daughter lost her holding as the baby in her family. No one cared about it, no one asked her if she wanted to be older than 3 other kids.

Our youngest is 2. He’s still the baby. We still call him the baby, but would his life be ruined if we had an infant come? Nope. But what’s interesting is that I think the ‘baby’ of the family would have a harder time losing that than an oldest would. There is something about being the baby. You get carried far beyond when you know how to walk, you get coddled and cooed at and everything you do is cute. When a younger child comes along through birth or adoption, all the sudden there is someone else who needs more attention. And what’s interesting is our foster daughter very much had the “baby” personality and was referred to as “the baby” by her other sisters, yet that was taken from her when she was placed with us.

A child who is the eldest supposedly learns maturity and how to care for the other children and has special responsibilities. If you add a child who is older, it doesn’t mean they can’t still do what an oldest would do. Having more helpers is awesome!

We went against the grain and did just what the “experts” say not to do. We took 2 children in who were older than our kids. And it worked wonderfully. Lord willing we’ll be messing it all up again when we adopt a sibling group.

Since the girls left, our oldest has had a hard time filling in his “oldest” child position. For almost 2 years, since before he can really remember even, he hasn’t been the oldest, he’s been the middle. He’s had someone to follow and shadow. I think he does better as a middle child, and I think his "birth order" was changed more when the girls left than when they came.

From where I stand, birth order is just one more excuse people use to not adopt, to not care for orphans. People say they have to wait to foster or adopt till their children are grown. And if they plan on having more biological kids then ever adopting or fostering is mostly a distant thought.

I’m a middle child, and I fit the bill, whatever that means. I think you are who you are, your life with your siblings does help define you. There are aspects to being the oldest, and being a middle child, and being a youngest, but I can’t shake the feeling that people make way too much out of it.

Sitting there at the meeting listening to the woman haphazardly state “don’t mess up your families birth order” made me cringe, and gave me a slight impulse to jump over the table and shake her by her shoulders and say “You can’t change someone’s birth order! They were born when they were born! There are huger issues to consider!” (Yes, I know huger isn’t a word.)

Every time I hear someone say not to mess up your birth order it sounds like nails down a chalk board. SCHREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECH! It’s not birth order you’re changing, it’s family placement, and I think kids can adapt.

Think of a sweet 10 year old boy being told “sorry, there’s no family for you, you’re too old.” He has a life time ahead of him, but he’s too old. Or a 14 year old girl ready to enter some of the most formative years of her life. Desperately needing a mom to help her with issues of self esteem, modesty and purity. Nope, she’s too old.

I’m sure there are people who can tell you horror stories of bringing in an older child or how messing up their kids birth order ruined their lives. Ok. But I believe that if you willingly submit to the plan God has, He’ll protect you. That doesn’t mean nothing will ever happen to your children, rather, your blessings will far exceed the trouble.

Of course it makes the family dynamic a bit more difficult when you add a new person who comes with likes, dislikes, a history, a personality that you had no part in forming. Sometimes though I think we’d be better off if we ignore the musings of psychologists and experts and simply be willing to love a child.

Just thinking lately...

2012-01-24T11:22:00.000-08:00

I was just thinking about all the cool coincidences that happen as a result of God’s sovereignty. They aren’t coincidences exactly, rather details that have been worked out in just a way that everything is as He wants it.

Recently my pastor talked briefly on 2 Peter 3:8 “But do not overlook this one fact, beloved, that with the Lord one day is as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day.” What does it mean that one day is like a thousand years? To me it means that the kids have been crazy, I had too much work, and I want the day to be over! But that’s not really what this verse means, rather it’s that even in one day, there could be tons of stuff that happened prior, just to make one thing happen.

Here’s the example I’ve been thinking of recently, and it’s just amazing to think of all the details and even all the disappointments that had to lead up to the final outcome.

I went to a business school for my first two years of college. It was a rinky dinky little school and for some reason I decided to transfer after I was done there (they only awarded associate degrees) to Eastern University and get my BA.

At the same time as this, another girl who I never met before went to school hundreds of miles away from her home in South Carolina, Charleston University I think. But after a year she decided to go back home and eventually transfer to Eastern University.

And at the same time as all of that, another girl decided to transfer from Lancaster Bible College to Eastern.

I was pretty nervous about going away to school-even if it was just 30 miles! I was going to live on campus and during the summer I got my roommate assignment. I would be with 2 other girls who were also transferring. I still even have the letter that gave me their names, address and phone number (ah, memories!).

Moving day was a whirlwind of finding where to go, hauling all my stuff to my new home, and meeting lots of new people, including my future sister in law!

It didn’t take long for the 3 of us to become friends, and for my brother to ask me who the “red head” in the pictures was!

Juliette, once my roommate (oh man, I’m just remembering so many funny things right now, like what happened the first night!!) is now my friend, and sister (in law) and the mom to the most wonderful little girls and my buddy Conner.

If I had decided to transfer early, or not transfer at all, or if she had stayed in Charleston or decided on another school, who knows what would have happened! Who knows if my goofy brother would have found someone to put up with his silliness the way she does!

This past weekend at my super cute nephew’s 2nd birthday, roughly 8 years after meeting for the first time, Juliette, Amanda and I were sitting around and joking about meeting each other and how everything worked together in such a great way.

And it’s really no coincidence at all! I love looking back at God’s handiwork at fitting pieces together. Maybe to a certain degree we felt we made mistakes going to the first schools we went to, and that transferring was a burden and set us back, to me it did some. But it was all part of God’s plan to give me the cutest little nephew and twin nieces you could imagine (ok ok, that’s a little selfish, there are bigger reasons!), Years of going to other schools, decisions being made, even resident planners assigning us to a room together, all part of God’s plan. Amazing!

Sometimes when something feels really tough, or I’m so disappointed by something, I remind myself of times like these where I can see God’s plan played out. We can’t always know the reason for something, but it’s a good reminder that He has a purpose. He isn’t carelessly letting us live our lives and hoping we turn out ok. He is sovereign.

Perhaps God is saying “Stay put, I want you to meet someone”, for one reason or another, or maybe He’s asking you to move because there is something He wants you to do, and maybe where you are or what you’re doing isn’t want you’d like. But ultimately, no mistakes are ever made by God.

Hmmm, if me going to Eastern was perhaps ultimately so my brother could meet his future spouse, wouldn’t it be fair for him to pay some of my students loans accrued from being there? I think so!

Adopt a family-lend a hand

2012-01-09T06:28:00.000-08:00

John and I currently have no foster children in our home. We are in the process of transferring our license to another agency and probably won’t be fully transferred and ready for matching (for adoption) till the spring.

So we wait. But after nearly 2 years of having 2 therapeutic level foster children in our home, things can feel a bit dull with our 3 kids. That is nothing against our sweet kids! Don’t get me wrong, they need to eat, and have activities, and be clothed and instructed, loved, and everything else that goes along with being a child, BUT as we have discovered, having children who are NOT involved in the system-is really much easier. Whenever someone makes a comment about being busy with 3, we can't help but chuckle and say "this is easy!" and watch as their face contorts into a look of questioning and skepticism.

Your child may have some issues, some problems, but if you are their parent, it can be easier. There is not a table full of people sitting around on a 6 month basis to discuss your parenting, what you’re doing right and wrong. It’s just different, and from experience, harder when you have a foster or possibly child adopted from care.

When we had our girls here, we had a behavioral specialist here on Thursdays for 2 hours, we had a social worker here twice a month for 1-2 hours (however long she wanted to make herself at home), a DHS worker once a month and another out of home appointment with the girls once a week that took the entire evening. Oh, and not to mention the visits almost every Saturday.

So what am I getting at?

When the girls left—we were left with a lot of time! To some extent I felt like I was sitting around twiddling my thumbs. What a waste of energy.

I’m proposing that if you don’t currently have a placement, or aren’t involved in foster care at all—help a family out who is! Maybe they currently have a foster placement, or maybe they have adopted from foster care (issues don’t dissolve when a child is adopted!), either way I would encourage you to find a family and pick from this list (or find other ways). I know it would mean so much to someone caring for a child in the system.

-Make them dinner! Find out what night is their most hectic (mine was Thursdays) and drop dinner off or provide them with everything needed for a crockpot meal. Or stock them up on a few meals to put in their freezer. Thursdays were crazy. Kids would get home around 3:30, behavioral specialist would come at 5, I needed to referee all 5 kids, get homework done try and make dinner all while also trying to be part of what was going on with the BSC. It was exhausting.

Maybe even commit to doing this on a weekly or bi-monthly basis, depending on the family’s schedule.

-Offer to babysit! This one can be tricky as sometimes a babysitter needs clearances and to be approved by the agency, but if the child is adopted already or you have clearances and are willing to work with the child’s “issues”, then give the parents a break!

-Find out what size the kids wear and purchase them a new piece of clothing (find out what they need most). This would be awesome especially in season changes.

-Buy the family a gift card to eat out, again, check with the family to see what would work best. Some kids have a hard time in loud, busy places so a sit down place might not work, but Burger King with a playland might! Even fast food with multiple children get add up. Or get them a gift card so they can order pizza or Chinese food in.

-Offer to provide transportation, again, if allowed by the agency. Transporting our foster daughters to their visits took the entire morning and into the afternoon. We’d leave at 9:30, drop them off around 10, pick them up at noon and it would take us till about 1pm to get home. Phew, that’s a lot! And that was 3 Saturdays a month. We either all went and John and I would take the kids to a park while we waited to pick up the girls, or one of us would go, leaving the other parent home with the remaining 3 kids.

-Offer to clean their house! Having appointments and meetings can mean less time for housework. But when you have people in your home all the time, you want it to be presentable. Offer to clean on a weekly or every other week basis. That would be a dream come true!

-Offer to take the kids to a park. Maybe a walk around the neighborhood. Even if it’s just 20 or 30 minutes, this would give mom or dad a minute to breath, sit or maybe make that phone call they’ve been putting off due to lack of quiet moments.

-Lend a handy hand to fix up the house. Maybe there are projects left unfinished and no time for the family to do them. Maybe there is a child who destroys property. This was our case and most times the damage was just left to sit there as a reminder of the child’s tantrums, simply because we didn’t have the time to do it. Or knew it would be broken again. Patching a wall, fixing a door, replace a window or get nail polish out of the carpet (he he, that wasn’t exactly tantrum related, but the stain is still there nonetheless!).

-Take their dog for a walk. If they have foster children, I bet that dog hasn’t gone on a walk in months!

-Invite them over for dinner. We have a few good friends that invited us over knowing the issues that could present themselves, yet were willing to love us enough to accept us and our children. It was easy to feel weird and a bit like an outcast. People seem like they aren’t sure how to act or what to do around foster kids sometimes. Act normal! Involve a foster family in normal activates and be willing to overlook the quirks their kids may exhibit.

-Pray. Commit 15 or 20 minutes a day to praying for them. Ask the family for prayer requests. Find out what the most difficult time of their day is, and pray for them during that time. Pray for perseverance, pray for comfort, pray that the Spirit would cover their home and their hearts, pray for the birth parents, the social workers, the judges, the therapists. Pray for patience and understanding for the parents and for compassion. Let them know you've committed to praying for them.

-Get the details. I don’t mean poke your nose in their business, but one of the best things we had when our foster daughters were here was a supportive family who wanted to understand. Be available to listen. My parents, sister, brother and sister in law were awesome in this. It wasn’t that they knew all the answers but it was the fact that I knew I could call them and vent or talk about the newest issue or drama or whatever. They were there to listen, and willing to put themselves into the trenches with us by knowing what was going on. Every person doesn’t need to know every detail but having a few people who will be involved enough to know what is really going on is really really helpful.

Not everyone is willing to be a foster parent or to adopt from foster care. It is a very hard calling, one that the Lord will always fully equip for, but it does come with unique difficulties. If you are not feeling called to help orphans in this way, I would encourage you to help a family who is.

It’s like that old saying “it takes a village to raise a child”. For some reason it seems like people have retreated into their own little tents and are only concerned with their own family. I still have 3 children, but like I said earlier, it is different. I am roaring to go with helping any family involved in the system with whatever I can (just let me know!). Walk along side a foster family. Commit to helping them in their journey. Be willing to accept any child they have in their home. Don’t ignore their situation, rather embrace it and show Christ’s servant hood love to them.

There aren’t words to express my gratitude for those who came along side John and I and our kids when the girls were with us. Once I was talking about how the girls hadn’t come with much in terms of clothes, and the next week at church, a lady brought a whole big bag of stuff in the girl’s sizes that had been her daughter’s! Thank you!

I couldn’t even begin to describe the support my parents and sister offered. Countless hours babysitting, so many dinners and just loving the “us” that we were. My sister in law was so helpful in offering her expertise and my brother did so much by just showing the girls what a goofy uncle is all about, something they had never experienced.

Our church family fully embraced us and were so supportive in their prayers and gracious in their numerous invitations to parties and dinners. God indeed placed us right where He wanted us. So thankful for FRBC!

Adopt a foster or adoptive family. Commit to supporting them. Find ways and follow through. Check in with them. Pray with them. Love them. I know it would mean so much.

We're ok.

2012-01-05T12:02:00.000-08:00

Some days are filled with confusion, still trying to understand what happened. Some days are filled with memory upon memory of chaotic days, and those memories are met with a guilt ridden relief that they are now behind us.

There are moments that I feel physically ill to think that it is truly over. And usually following those feelings are ones of anger at the system and the people responsible. There are moments of anger at the individuals who spear headed the permanent change and those who stood idly by doing nothing. Weariness creeps up when I think of all the weeks we spent fighting and pleading that they could come home.

So much disbelief that it ended this way, and a sense of helplessness that there is nothing left to do.

Many days there is numbness. It’s easier to push the feelings away then confront them. I tell my mind to move on, move on, move on. But I was their mother. They were my daughters, and it’s not so easy. Sometimes, in parenting mode, I would play out the conversation I would have if they had come home, and reinforce how serious words are and that they must be taken seriously. There are moments of anger at a child who didn’t understand the power of her words, and didn’t take seriously the words of caution spoken to her about telling lies.

But today, I’m sad. A sadness that is not easily brushed off. A heavy ache in my heart. A bitter sadness that does not easily let up. A sadness that makes it hard to believe that things will be ok. It’s sadness not only for myself and my loss, but also for the girls, and my 3 children left at home with broken hearts. It’s a sadness I can mostly push away, but when I hear my daughter sobbing in her bed and I go to her and she cries that she misses her sisters, I’m not strong enough to fight it.

Someday I tell myself to just shut up and forget it. I mean, this is what we signed up for right? Foster care. Love ‘em and let ‘em go. Simple right? I don’t know that it ever would have been easy, but definitely not after 20 months.

I can’t express the comfort there is in knowing that this grieves others. Not that I want people to be sad, but people really love us and care about us enough—that it breaks their hearts too. And many of these people are ‘new’ to our lives. People that God put in our lives knowing we’d need them.

But there is insult added to injury so to speak when our loss doesn’t prompt the proper response from those it should. It becomes apparent that for some, the girls being here wasn’t important enough to make their leaving have any impact. And that makes me so sad. Some can only see the hard parts, and forget that we lost our children. Sometimes it feels like I have to grieve extra for those who won’t. My girls deserve to be missed, but so many ignored that fact that they were even here, so it doesn’t necessarily surprise me that their leaving is dismissed.

I hope they’re ok. I hope they are being loved and cared for. I miss them so much. There is no doubt that God is in control of it all, but I was their mom, and they were my girls, and it's not easy to forget what that all meant.

But we are ok. We’re hopeful for the future. We want to press on. If I’ve learned anything from all of this, it’s don’t take one second for granted, you really may not have another.

God with us

2011-12-22T18:50:00.001-08:00

Jesus, the King of Glory came and dwelt among us.

The Santa Dilemma

2011-12-08T08:24:00.000-08:00

Here’s the thing, there IS something wrong about letting Santa become the object of affection at Christmas. Many parents, many Christian parents, simply don’t want to hear that.

A few months ago we had a birthday party for one of our kids. At the time, another child of ours had some very unpleasant attention seeking issues. I wanted to spend my time at the party gushing over my daughter and meeting her every need and wish. I wanted her to feel so special. Sadly though, most of my time was spent deflecting obnoxious behavior and ensuring a tantrum didn’t break out because my other child could not handle splitting the attention.

This issue frustrated me to no end. I shouldn’t have to spend my energy on coddling this other child when it was my daughter’s birthday, she deserved my attention.

Sure, this is a poor comparison to the magnitude of Christmas but to me it kinda makes sense.

My King was born! It’s a day to celebrate His birth, and not just that he was born, but he was born with the purpose to save! Literally to save people from eternal separation from God.

But there’s this attention seeking, fat old man stomping his feet and demanding attention.

My issue with Santa isn’t really about lying to my kids. Although I do not lie to my children, I may allow them to use their imagination without bursting their bubble. It’s a story they are believing, just as they might believe there is a talking train named Thomas.

When my child tells me they want to fly, I don’t automatically tell them “That would NEVER happen.” In fact I remember jumping off a table over and over again while holding an umbrella hoping that it would pick up enough air to send me flying into the stratosphere. Did my parents say “Debbie, that is the dumbest thing ever!”? No. I think there is a time and place for imagination, but not when it comes to putting Jesus aside.

See, giving presents ISN’T the meaning of the season. The birth of Christ is! I admit I used to float through Christmas knowing what it was all about, but not letting it have much purpose. Sure, we’d take the kids to see Santa and set out cookies and talk about the things he might bring.

But what about what Jesus DID bring? I think the reason Santa bothers me so much more this year and increasingly each year, is because I really love Jesus. I really want Him to be celebrated, just as I wanted my daughter to be celebrated at her birthday. I want Him to have our attention, and not have to appease someone else. I don’t want to have to pretend that Santa is real so that my kids are happy, or make sure they get enough stuff so they enjoy their Christmas.

I haven't sat my kids down to say “Santa isn’t real”, because right now that isn’t really the issue. The issue is that I want them to love Jesus more than they love Santa, more than they love getting presents.

I want my kid’s hearts to swell with the gratitude of knowing Jesus came to save them. He was a king, and came to the peasants. He left His riches to come to the poor. I want the excitement to be focused on the joy of knowing they can have a life in Him, and that the story of Christmas is real.

Santa is EVERYWHERE! It is crazy. And it is so easy to fall prey to the marketing, the worldliness and to brush it all off in the name of fun and giving. It's so easy to make excuses for why it's fine and ok to go along with the flow of the world.

We have been deliberate about not talking about Santa. If they bring it up, I usually change the subject to something meaningful about Christmas. I haven’t said “What will you ask Santa for?”, rather, I asked them for idea of things they might like. Because, the truth is, Santa isn’t bringing them anything! But at this point, I don’t feel the need to say that.

Would it ruin my kids childhood to know Santa isn’t real? Of course not. My kids are honestly not very caught up in lots of toys and stuff. But, I would rather them have a childhood built on the truths of Christ, the truths of Christmas. I would pray they would find their joy in the promise of eternal life, possible by the birth and death of Jesus.

Even the songs about Christmas have me scowling. Songs about Santa, make no sense. For instance, “Santa knows we’re all God’s children and that makes everything right, so let’s give thanks to the Lord above for Santa Clause comes tonight.” Huh? Actually, we’re not all God’s children unfortunately and Christmas is a great time to tell others of the gift of Christ. That song really just has no point.
But listen to the lyrics of a song full of truth, “Silent night, holy night!
Shepherds quake at the sight
Glories stream from heaven afar
Heavenly hosts sing Alleluia!
Christ, the Saviour is born
Christ, the Saviour is born”

Yep! Christ, MY Saviour is born!

I find it interesting that so many secular musical artists simply tweek an already existing Christmas song and sing it. They might change a few notes around and try to sing it better than all the others, but really they have nothing substantial to say. There isn't much meaning in Christmas. Once in a while a new Christmas song will be written, but usually they make even less sense than songs about Santa, like Italian Donkeys and Hippopotamuses, or a song may get popular because they spark an emotional response (i.e Christmas Shoes).

But listen to artists who understand Christmas, and you’ll hear the hope and joy they have—believers can write song upon song (I think Sovereign Grace Music just put out a CD of 11 all NEW Christmas songs) because we have something to actually sing about! More than a story, more than a fable, we’re singing about a life changing event that has eternal meaning!

I know this could make me sound corny. Religious. Scroogish. But really, I’m not (ok, well corny might be true, and I do love corn…that’s for you dad if you read this!). It’s just that I’m fully convinced that Jesus really did love me so much that he came to meet me where I was. He really loved me so much that He would do anything to make it possible for me to be with Him, even come to earth and die.

Lately I’ve been meditating on all of this and something came to mind. Matthew 6:24 “No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money.”

Santa is the picture of money, gifts, shopping, spending, getting, and materialism. You can’t have Christmas be about Jesus AND Santa. It doesn’t work that way. Now, maybe this verse really doesn’t apply, but I was convicted by it; I believe God put in on my heart in response to my thoughts on this.

It can’t be Santa’s celebration AND Jesus’s. One or the other will be put on the sidelines. If you spend your time prepping your kids for Santa’s arrival, and the reindeer and the presents, don’t be surprised when they are bored by the story of lowly shepherds, and cattle.

But, if you truly wish to prepare your family for the celebration of the King of King’s birth, then put Santa in the corner and focus on the real true facts. Christ came to save. It’s not about the giving and gifts, it’s about The Gift.

Following in my family’s tradition, a simple cross made from sticks hangs from the top of our tree. Not a pretty lighted angel or star (although I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that). A cross, where a grown baby, born on Christmas, died for the sins of His people. Where He died so we could have peace. If He hadn’t come, if there were no Christmas, there would be no cross. I’m so thankful He came.

I promise, I’m not a scrooge. I’m not going to refuse gifts wrapped in Santa paper (yep, there are some that intent on ignoring Santa, and that’s ok for them), I’m not going to make my kids tell all their friends that Santa isn’t real (which, by the way, that is the truth). But I am going to take every opportunity to remind my kids that Jesus is REAL, and he really can be their King and he really can save them!

I pray this season’s Joy is in the King, not Santa. I pray that your family and mine are overwhelmed with the gift given for us, and that we would enthusiastically give to others in that way, especially finding ways to give to those in need, just as God did for us.

Bah Hum Bug

2011-11-23T12:22:00.000-08:00

When Christmas lights started adorning porches and bushes and doorways a few weeks ago, my husband and I would shake our heads in disapproval. We’d scoff at the people who jumped the gun. We’d mock them for not following the obvious holiday celebration protocol. Take one holiday at a time people!

When I walked into a store before Halloween and heard holiday music playing I scowled and thought “ humph, that’s too early!”.

We must wait till after Thanksgiving to celebrate the birth of our king right? I mean, we only need 6 weeks to prepare for the most important birth in history. Anything more is just plain excessive!

Wait. Huh? Now I know the department stores have ulterior motives and want people to start spending, but maybe they’re onto something.

In past years I have put off decorating, and then when it finally came time I was so busy with everything I hastily put up a wreath and that’s about it.

Recently I was thinking, “man, I really need to start some Christmas shopping.” This year, like many others, I’ve been having a hard time jumpstarting my excitement.

Today I was thinking how excited Mary must have been for the birth of her baby. With each of my pregnancies I became more and more eager to meet my baby as the weeks went on. Mary knew her baby was special; he was the Savior of the world. And I know without His birth I would still be dead, left with no hope. No salvation, no king, no lord. I don’t even know what the point of anything would be.

He was born to give us life! His life gives us life! And as we approach Thanksgiving, at the risk of sounding cliché, I am just so thankful that Jesus was born!

Realizing even more what my life in Him means, I’m so excited to celebrate His birth. The birth of my King!

I don’t know much about what goes on in monarchies, but I bet there is some sort of big birthday celebration for the King or Queen each year. And maybe it doesn’t affect the life of the regular people who can’t afford to attend the gala, but the preparation that goes into it must be enormous. How much more so should the King of Kings birth be? Not just checking a list, but truly preparing to celebrate what His birth means.

So now I’m excited! And I think we’ll decorate this week, and next year we might do it before Thanksgiving (gasp!).

Bah Hum buh no more!

He told us to!

2011-11-08T06:38:00.001-08:00

I have to admit, I am left speechless when Christians ask John and me "WHY??" when we tell them of our desire to serve the Lord through foster care. To me, it seems like a no-brainer in many ways. Thousands of children need homes, right here in our community! There are very few reasons one couldn't help children.

Why would we do this? In the past I have plainly and excitedly stated, "God told us!". I was dead serious though, not meaning to be difficult or vague. It is strange though that people needed further explanation.

"Ok, right, but really though, why?".

We prayed for God to use us how He willed. We were sick of participating in "ministries" which were nothing more than religious clubs and groups, not aimed at serving Him. We were tired of playing the church game. We wanted God to put us to work.

So we prayed, and He answered. He could have called us to Africa, or Asia or another city, or something else completely. But He gave us a desire to open our hearts and homes to children.

The Bible is clear about orphan care, and God was clear when He spoke to us about it.

SO WHY do people need other answers? I can see their brains turning with more questions, "Why do you need more kids? Just have more of your own.", or "Ugh. Those types of kids are so messed up."

It's true, we could have just kept having more and more and more kids. But that isn't what the Lord wanted from us. Yes, often children in the foster care system do have problems, because of the life they were given. Does that make them undeserving of a stable home? Of love?

After being in foster care for 2 years now, we still get the WHY question. Why do you keep doing it? Why do you want to do it? Why Why Why???

But sometimes people, mostly Christians, don't like the answer I give. They don't want to believe that we can be joyful despite a tough situation, they don't want to imagine that maybe, just maybe, they should be experiencing a little hardship on account of a child. They don't want to believe that sometimes, there is no better place to be than in the trenches of life. They don't want to believe that sometimes, God does NOT want us to have a simple, easy life.

Why do we want to foster? Why do we want to adopt? Why do we want to have 5 or 6 or 7 or 8 or....(I better stop there!) kids? Why was I looking at 12 passenger vans today on Craigslist? Why do we want to build our family through foster care and adoption?

Because HE told us to! He's given His Word on it, and He's put it in our hearts. He has given us a way to bring Glory to Himself! What could be better than that?

I like to keep my answer short when people ask. I simply tell them "God told us to.", and let them deal with any insecurities they have about that. It's an amazing thing to hear the voice of the Lord directly telling you what gifts He has for you and in what ways He wants to give them to you.

Suffering

2011-10-27T06:54:00.000-07:00

Suffering.
Wow. To say the past 8 days have been hard would be an understatement. More like agonizing, devastating, crushing.

Without going into too much detail, the world of foster care has again left us in turmoil.
I’ll be honest, it’s hard to trust God in the really bad times. To know He’s in control and believe that in the end, no matter what, it will be for the good of us. To not want to give up. To keep praying.

At red lights I sob. In the mornings I wake up feeling nauseous at what the day holds. All day I’m holding my breath not knowing what will happen. I can barely get my work done. My kids are sad, I am sad and I can’t do anything about it.

I’ve done my fair share of shouting WHY???????? to God and hoping He’d change His mind about this and straighten everything out. I need to learn a few things from Job, who trusted God despite terrible suffering.

There was so much unjustified suffering in the Bible. People who had done nothing wrong were punished for something they didn’t do. I’m reminded of Joseph and Potiphar’s wife. Joseph is thrown into jail for allegedly (word I learned from foster care) sleeping with an official’s wife. He didn’t, but he was thrown in jail for it.

If Joseph was anything like me, he cried, he asked why, he reasoned, he speculated. But there was a reason for it all.

Then I think of Jesus. The ultimate example of doing no wrong but suffering for it.
He was the perfect man, guilty of no sin. Yet he was punished and killed for our sins.

Why? For His glory. For the Glory of God. He willingly took the suffering knowing that in the end, His name would be glorified. He didn’t get out of the beatings, he didn’t get out of dying. But in the end, it was good. God's will was accomplished.

As I think of this situation, I wonder how I can suffer through this and bring glory to Him. Even if in the end, things seen wrong, will I have glorified His name? Will His light in me show, even in the midst of a trial and heartache?

We are never promised easy. And if your life is easy, you’re doing something wrong.

Maybe sometimes I just need to be brought to my knees, sometimes maybe I need a reminder of what a commitment is, to know what the “worse” in ‘for better or worse’ can really mean. Or maybe it’s none of those things and has nothing to do with me.

Sin causes a lot of suffering. And often, the sin of someone else can affect many other people.

Certainly this situation has derived from sin. Lies, deceit, selfishness. It can even trail back to over 2 years ago when certain sins caused certain issues which indirectly led to this. When someone sins against someone else, there are often rabbit trails of other sin which come from the originating sin. Sin hurts people. Sin is evil. Sin has consequences. Somewhere along the way there has to be a stop in the cycle.

Jesus died for our sin. He suffered for us because He loves us. He is the cycle stopper. We do not need to continue to sin.

And when we suffer because of the sin of someone else, we can be reminded of Jesus.
In our suffering we should not harbor bitter feelings towards the person, we should not seek revenge, we should continue to love and pray for the person.

I hope when this is all over, no matter what, I will have suffered in a way that brings glory to God. Although I feel like tearing my clothes and wearing sackcloth while sitting in mud or dust or whatever it is they used to do way back in the day, I have to be faithful. I have to stay faithful for all the other things He has entrusted to me, and show others how even in suffering, you can still glorify God.

I hope that’s the testimony I leave. I pray God gives us the strength to stay faithful and not falter in our love. I pray we can show mercy and grace to those who have wronged us.

I pray for an end, but I pray that the end does not come until God is glorified through this suffering.

A Marriage Carol

2011-09-26T18:11:00.000-07:00

ChristianAudio.com review of A Marriage Carol by Chris Fabry & Gary Chapman.

This book is a modern marraige based adaptation of A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens. Just before Jake and Marlee call it quits on their marriage Marlee is given the opportunity to see the what-ifs of the three "ghosts" of Christmas.

Without going into much detail, I didn't like this book. I like the premise and I thought the message was good but I just didn't find it entertaining. I don't mean to be nit-picking but if I am going to listen to fiction, it needs to be entertaining. Honestly, I think it might work as a movie. Its a short story so nothing would need to be cut. Good emotional acting could make it easier to relate to the characters.

The Positive:

The quality of the recording was excellent and the narration was very good.

2 Stars

Review of Lion of Babylon

2011-08-15T07:09:00.000-07:00

I had the priviledge of receiving a free copy of Lion of Babylon from ChristianAudio.com in return for this review.

Lion of Babylon is about a former US intelligence agent who was sent into Iraq to save an old friend of his that had been kidnapped.

Overall, I enjoyed this book. I didn't love it. I found the writing similar in suspense to a James Patterson book, without feeling the need to force a love affair into the book. I saw this as a good thing. I used to like listening to Patterson's books on audio, but I found them unedifying to my soul. I recommend Lion of Babylon to anyone who likes the suspense genre and wants a clean and positive story to read.

Also, Paul Boehmer does an excellent job as the reader.

3 Stars!

Hind's Feet on High Places Review

2011-08-09T18:20:00.001-07:00

In the past, I have done and posted reviews for ChristianAudio.com as a trade off to get free books. But, since ChristianAudio.com is incredibly awesome I decided for now on I am just going to post reviews for every book I listen to.

Starting with Hind's Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard and read by Nadia May.

Before picking this up I had just finished the Pilgrim's Progress for the first time and I was in the mood for another good Christian allegory. Hinds' Feet for High Places did not disappoint. This book will encourage a Christian on their walk and through time of difficulty. The main character in the book is a weak, feeble deformed girl named Much-Afraid and the book tells of her travel from the Valley of Humiliation to the High Places. Without giving too much of the book away, I will say that the thing I liked most about the book was that whenever Much-Afraid was in trouble she simply had to call for the Shepherd and he was always there. The parallel to our lives was that even though every time she called on him, he came, she never called on him immediately, she only remembered to call him in her points of utmost desperation. As I listened, I kept thinking "WHY DOESN'T SHE CALL FOR THE SHEPHERD!!", then I realized how much I do the same thing.

5 STARS!

Thankful for Hardships

2011-07-18T20:21:00.000-07:00

The last few weeks have been difficult. But I thank God for them. I realize that when I don't have something difficult going on in my life, I am quick to take my eyes off of Jesus and onto things that really don't matter. Perhaps one of the reasons these difficulties come(as God can do one thing for a multitude of different reasons for different people to bring him Glory) is to correct my focus.

Coincidentally(or more precisely by God's Sovereignty), over the past few weeks I have also listened to The Pilgrim's Progress by John Bunyan. In the second half of the book the wife and children of the main character from the first half(Christian) go on their own pilgrimage to the Celestial city. On their way they come across the same spots Christian did(as there is only one road and it is narrow). They were led by a guide named Great-heart who in this passage points out to the group a spot where Christian had one his greatest battles at a place beyond Forgetful Green.

"Your father had that battle with APOLLYON at a place yonder, before us, in a narrow passage just beyond Forgetful Green. And indeed that place is the most dangerous place in all these parts. For if at any time the pilgrims meet with any brunt, it is when they forget what favours they have received, and how unworthy they are of them. This is the place also where others have been hard put to it. But more of the place when we are come to it; for I persuade myself that, to this day, there remains either some sign of the battle, or some monument to testify that such a battle there was fought."

Lord, help keep me from Forgetful Green. In times of hardship and mourning help me to remember the favors I have received and how unworthy I am to have received any or them. Help me to remember that I was dead and you gave me life. That I was blind and you gave me sight. Help me to have a Christ centered perspective and not a self-centered one. Help me to remember in times of stupid frustration and anger for things not being the way I want, that I really deserve Hell. Help me in difficult times to "Rejoice in the Lord always" and to realize the comfort of your rod and staff.

Are you a Slave of Christ?

2011-03-29T08:50:00.000-07:00

ChristianAudio.com review of Slave by John MacArthur.

The message of this book is a message that professing American Christians need to hear. The message is that as Christians we are now slaves of Christ. Many Christians understand that we were once slaves to sin and as believers we are free from that slavery. But, as MacArthur explains in this book, when we are reborn, we are born into another slavery, slavery to Christ. We are not our own, we were bought with a price.

The book starts by calling out modern bible translators as falling into a coverup in mistranslating the word slave for servant in many places. I don't know greek but he does lay down a good case showing servant to be a mistranslation of the greek word doulos and I agree that slave is a better translation, but I think the word coverup might be a little strong.

MacArthur defined both servanthood and slavery and explained their differences in the book and why those differences are important. One difference that stuck out to me was that slavery is not by choice.

As I listened to this book, I couldn't help but see the parellels to MacArthur's work in 'The Gospel According to Jesus'. If we are truely slaves to Christ once we are born again, doesn't that end the whole Lordship/Easy believism debate? If you have truely been born again then you are a slave and you have a loving gracious Lord and Master in Jesus Christ.

One powerful section of this book is the description of early Christian martyrs that proclaimed their slavery to Christ as a badge of honor. These martyrs died because they would not deny their master.

"To be a Christian is to be a slave of Christ."

Would you describe yourself as a slave of Christ?

Do you recognize Jesus as your master?

Living like there is no hell?

2011-03-23T07:35:00.000-07:00

There has been a lot of debate recently stemming from a book/video put out by a pastor named Rob Bell. He put forth false teachings about the bible and hell. To be as upfront and honest as possible, the idea of hell was a struggle of mine up until maybe a year or two ago. I can see why so many people want to change what the bible says to make Christianity more palatable. What really helped me was just reading the bible and reading/listening to exposition on the attributes of God. Doing this helped me get a glimpse of an understanding of how horrible sin really is and an even smaller understanding of how holy God is.

My point of writing this wasn't to point out the fallacies of Rob Bell and modern univeralism. What led me to write this blog was actually a convicting tweet I read from someone I don't know at all named John Musick.

He wrote:

"Let's get real. Those who ardently say they believe in a fiery hell don't in any way operate their lives like they do."

Sadly, I have to agree with his assessment for the most part. I've been struggling over the past couple weeks to put any response into words. This morning I came across a short video clip with David Platt where he calls this type of living "functional universalism". He points out that it is worse than the intellectual universalism of a Rob Bell or others. I encourage everyone reading this to please listen to his response to the horrific sin of functional universalism that John Musick points out in the lives of Christians.

Do We Really Believe What We're Saying? from The Church at Brook Hills on Vimeo.

World event-Earthquake and Tsunami

2011-03-14T12:21:00.000-07:00

Everyone is well aware of the recent events in Japan. An earthquake followed by a tsunami. I’ve watched some footage of the day it happened and it grieves my heart and makes me feel burdened.

This indeed is sad and tragic. Thousands dead-and I’m sure many of them were unbelievers and died in their sin. Many have gone to meet their Savior, and for them there is no where better to be.

I have two responses to the recent tragedy that hit Japan.

My first response is to those who say “The End of the World is upon us!” or “This is fulfilling prophesy! His return is soon!”

Ok. So? Praise God-I pray His return is soon! But what are you DOING about it??
Say for example I KNEW a Tsunami would hit the east coast at 11:00 am on March 15, 2011. You better be sure I would be preparing, telling everyone, and doing whatever I could to spread the news. I’d be shaking people’s shoulders trying to get them to believe me that a disaster would soon strike if they weren’t prepared.

Guess what? There IS a tsunami of sorts coming-it’s called judgment day.
If people are so convinced the Lord’s return is imminent, why aren’t they, why aren’t I running out and telling everyone I see, or everyone that I know is unsaved, that they need to repent? Why aren’t I shaking people by their shoulders begging them to believe the truth I tell them?
Knowledge does nothing. What one does with knowledge is important.

It just seems like so many are concerned with matching up such and such Bible verse with this and that world event-but it does nothing to change their way of living, and what I mean is that it doesn’t propel them to spread the Gospel.

My second response to the tragedy that struck Japan is….WAKE UP!
On Sunday my pastor talked a little bit about how death is normal but it is the unexpected way in which it happened that made this unusual (I’ll post his sermon once it’s up on our church’s website because it’s really insightful).

An unexpected natural disaster strikes and kills thousands. Terrible. Very very sad.
What is EVEN sadder to me is that EVERY DAY thousands and thousands DIE from PREVENTABLE DISEASES and HUNGER! Ok, pardon my Caps but this really bothers me. Yes, the earthquake and tsunami are responsible for many deaths, but so are you and so am I if we do nothing about the world hunger and lack of medical necessities.

These people do not have to die. There wasn’t a catastrophic natural disaster. Rather, while people in the Western Hemisphere are eating 3 and 4 meals a day plus what ever snacks their heart desires, they’re eating a cup of rice a day.

It doesn’t take long to Google “World hunger” and come up with tons of information.
I quickly found this website: http://www.bread.org/hunger/global/

“Every day, almost 16,000 children die from hunger-related causes. That's one child every five seconds.”
That is EIGHT times the amount of deaths that Japan’s death toll will likely reach….and that is EVERY DAY. I don't mean to diminish the lives lost in Japan, but rather put it in perspective.

When something like an earthquake or tsunami happens, it’s all over the news. You can’t get away from it. But with hunger, it’s not the same. Once in awhile a commercial will run on TV featuring a hungry child-and people turn the channel! Don’t guilt ME into giving! (Scheesh, isn’t it so simple to live in ignorance?)

Why is it acceptable for Christians to ignore such huge problems like hunger but be devastated by a natural disaster? There is nothing I could have done to stop the earth from shaking or the waves from rolling in…but there is a lot I can do to stop hunger. And there is a lot I can do to encourage people to prepare their hearts for the Lord’s return.

Japan is facing many challenges and I pray that the Lord using this catastrophe to bring even one person to Him. I pray rubble is cleared and that bodies are quickly found so that families aren’t left wondering. I pray that Japan can rebuild their hope, their lives and their faith.

I pray that this world event does not simply make you shake your head and say “wow” but rather that it pushes you to come to terms with the reality of calamity all over the world. I pray that it gives you intensity in your witness. I pray that you open your heart and force down the walls of hardness and ignorance about other serious issues and that you take personal responsibility for doing everything you can to end plagues such as hunger, unsanitary water sources and inaccessible medical supplies. I pray that it awakens you to the lost who are still living and need Jesus.

Let this disaster leave you different. Let the Lord use this to transform your heart, to change your priorities, to bring you closer to Him.

Living by God's Promises Review

2011-03-09T07:17:00.000-08:00

ChristianAudio.com review of Living by God's Promises by Joel Beeke and James La Belle.

This book is a great resource that I found very edifying. Its not a book that is easy listening by any stretch. Its basically goes through passages of three great puritan writers regarding the promises of God. How we can trust, live and pray those promises. The authors do a great job of weaving together the works of Andrew Gray, Edward Leigh, and William Spurstowe into easily understandable messages. The reading was also superb. Its a very difficult task quoting puritans and long passages of scripture together and making it easy to follow. There is so much in this book that I cannot really go through step by step, but below are some great quotes I noted while listening.

"If you refuse to come, consider that Christ will not forever endure such self-destructive madness."

"God's word is full of his promises to us. But when we are called upon to believe them we measure their firmness by the improbabilities and impossibilites of our circumstances instead of the strength of God's power."

"Faith will see a morning approaching in the times of greatest trouble."

"It is by meditation that we dive into the depths of the promise and make clefts into the promise."

"Yet in the midst of this suffering and groaning we have the assurance that the Spirit helps us in our weakness and intercedes for us according to the will of God....because our suffering is for our glorification, and the Spirit intercedes for us to ensure that outcome...we know that all things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to his purpose as children whom he has made co-heirs with Christ."

"God assures me, he will lay no more on me than I shall be able to bear. Either my burden shall be made lighter or my faith stronger."

"Temptation like everything in this life is subject to our heavenly father's good and gracious providence."

"Even temptations are ordained to help us grow in grace."

"No matter how great are our sins, God gives more grace. He has more grace than all our fears, all our doubts, all our sins and all our faithlessness."

"No matter how many times they fall, he forgives them as if it were the first time."

"God promises sanctification by his spirit. Since God promises and secures the indwelling of his Holy Spirit the necessary consequence is that he promises and secures our sanctification. God cannot dwell in hearts by his Holy Spirit without renovating and purifying it with his influence."

Top 20 Christian Netflix Movies

2011-03-02T18:01:00.000-08:00

In an effort to watch less garbage and more movies that are edifying to our souls, Deb and I started watching Christian/Faith based movies through Netflix awhile back. I realized pretty quickly that finding these movies on Netflix wasn't as easy as I thought it would be because there is no category for Christian movies. So as I found more movies I added them to our queue. After watching a bunch I decided to make this list to share it with others out there that might be doing the same thing we are.

This list is going to grow as I will try to update it frequently as we watch more movies. If you have a movie you would like to recommend us watching so we can add it to this list, please leave a comment and I most likely add it to our queue.

I would like to say that we don't necessarily agree completely with the doctrine or theology in all these movies. So a movie being on this list does not mean we endorse it in that way. Some movies I wrote a note about, others I took the description directly from Netflix.

Great Movies

1. The Hiding Place - Based on the story of Corrie ten Boom and her family sheltering Jews in their house to keep them from the Nazi's. This is an amazing story that shows servitude, forgiveness and reliance on God.

2. Amish Grace - Incredible movie based off of the true story of the Amish School shooting. The forgiveness displayed in this movie is amazing. The acting is also very good.

3. Amazing Grace - "The story of William Wilberforce (Ioan Gruffudd), an 18th-century English politician who fought for the abolition of slavery." *

4. Love Comes Softly - (1st in Series)"In the wake of her husband's death, newly widowed pioneer woman Marty tries to survive life on the open range by heeding the advice of friends (Corbin Bernsen and Theresa Russell), marrying a man she doesn't love and caring for his child." *

Good Movies

5. The Last Sin Eater - I was hesitant about this one because the title seemed kind of odd, but this movie was really good. I definitely liked it a little more than Deb, although she liked it too. I think she might have had this one a few spots lower though.

6. The Ultimate Gift - "When his wealthy grandfather finally dies, Jason Stevens fully expects to benefit when it comes to the reading of the will. But instead of a sizable inheritance, Jason receives a test, a series of tasks he must complete before he can get any money." *

7. Love's Enduring Promise - (2nd in Series)"The Davis family's farm is threatened after Clark suffers an injury. A stranger comes to the family's aid and falls in love with Clark's daughter Missie." *

8. The Secrets of Jonathan Sperry - This is a good movie that shows how the actions of one person can significantly impact many others, in a good way in this case. (Available to watch Instantly)

9. Flywheel - "Dishonest used-car salesman Jay Austin reaches an important turning point in his life when he finally realizes the errors of his ways and sets out to win back the love and trust of his wife, his son and the community." *

10. Saving Sarah Cain - Between Amish Grace and this movie its hard not falling in love with the amish. In this one, an Amish woman dies, leaving her children to her sister who lives in the big city. I'm thinking about submitting the two Amish movies to duke it out on film feuds.

Pretty Good Movies

11. Love's Abiding Joy (4th in Series)- "Homesteaders Missie and Willie LaHaye are struggling to raise a family on their farm in the Old West. When Missie's father arrives for a visit on the newly built railroad line, an unexpected tragedy will test the family's love and faith." *

12. Love's Long Journey (3rd in Series)- "Brimming with pioneer spirit, young marrieds Missie and Willie LaHaye hit the trail west in a covered wagon, intending to set down roots as homesteaders. But while she's elated at the adventure that awaits, Missie's feeling the loss of her kinfolk. Armed with faith and fortitude, the couple seeks out "family" in their new home, fortuitously finding it in unexpected places."*

13. The Lost and Found Family- "In this inspirational family drama, the luxurious lifestyle Ester Hobbes leads is shattered by the death of her husband. Left with nothing but a house rented to a foster family, Ester soon finds a deeper purpose in life. Forced to move in, she plans to sell the home, but her growing faith and attachment to troubled teen Justin and the others lead her on a divine journey as all their lives are transformed."*

14. Like Dandelion Dust - This is a story about an adoptive family who after raising their son for 8 years is threatened with losing him. This movie was produced by fox faith, which is why I added it to the queue. But, this movie has very little to due with God. It is a good movie though and I thought the acting was very good.

Just Okay Movies

15. Love's Unfolding Dream (6th in Series)-"In this installment of author Janette Oke's frontier saga, 18-year-old aspiring doctor Belinda Tyler finds herself torn between love and the medical profession. While proving her skills working as an apprentice to the town physician, Belinda loses her heart to newly arrived young attorney Drew Simpson"*

16. Letters to God - "Tyler Doherty, an 8-year-old boy who battles brain cancer and turns to God as his own private pen pal. Tyler writes and mails his missives daily, and his steadfast undertaking not only moves his family and friends, but it also alters the life of despairing postman."* (Available to watch Instantly)

17. Love's Unending Legacy(5th in Series)-"This entry in the frontier saga about the spirited LaHaye family finds widow Missie moving back to her father's ranch with her son when she's forced to give up her land. On a whim, she adopts a teenage orphan but has trouble bonding with the girl -- who's harboring a secret. Meanwhile, Missie begins to have feelings for the town sheriff, Zach Tyler"*

18. The Trial- "Following the death of his wife and sons, small-town lawyer "Mac" McClain has lost the will to live, but he sets aside despair to defend young Pete Thomason in a high-stakes case involving first-degree murder."*

Not So Good Movies

19. Last Flight Out- "With a gang of drug runners closing in on the remote Colombian village of Alto Risco and threatening to take over, time is running short for medical missionary Ann Williams in this faith-based adventure"*

20. The List- "After his father's sudden death, Renny Jacobson's only inheritance is an interest in something called the Covenant List of South Carolina. He soon discovers that all those connected with the list inherit both untold fortune -- and an ancient curse. Bound to the Covenant by blood, Renny fights to escape his evil destiny"*

* Quote from Netflix Movie description

Change the world by drinking Coffee

2011-02-21T10:27:00.000-08:00

The title probably has you a little bit skeptical, but you shouldn't be. A few weeks ago I came across a program called 'The One Cup Project' that I want to share with as many people as possible, because I think it is really awesome. Instead of trying to describe it myself I am going to do some cut and pasting from different pages on onecup.org.

The birth of The One Cup Project
The One Cup Project was born when Silver Cup’s owner and founder, Christian Kar, read the book “The Hole in Our Gospel” by World Vision President Rich Stearns. In his book, Rich lays out a host a major problems that beset the third world, AND how utterly solvable they are, if given enough resources and time.

Christian called World Vision and asked how we could help. Together they came up with a plan to leverage donations from the sales of Award-Winning Silver Cup Coffee with existing multiplier matching grants.

With the help of these grants, we are able to send the full dollar amount of your coffee purchase to World Vision. That’s right, every last cent.

How It Works
Every $11 bag you buy at www.onecup.org sends a $2 donation to World Vision, which is then multiplied 5.5x by matching grant partners (USAID, Care, Land O’ Lakes Foundation) so $11 goes to fund the good work World Vision does in Africa. The One Cup Project has a 0% administrative cost.

If you are anything like me, you are probably thinking that $11 for a 12 ounce bag of coffee is pretty steep, well it is. Me and Deb typically buy the big 30 ounce containers of Maxwell House and go through about 2 a month. So, I had to think about how to make this work. First, I realized that everyday I was making 10 cups of coffee in the morning but only 8 were being drank. Saved 20% right there! So that brought us from about 60 ounces a month to 48, which would be 4 bags from OneCup a month. This still doubles our coffee budget for the month but instead of spending 20 a month and the money going to Kraft foods and the supermarket, we spend 24 dollars more and 44 dollars goes towards helping the poor. Plus, the coffee is really good!

If you currently drink Starbucks at home or in store, buying this coffee would not cost you any more than your current coffee, and Silver cup is just as good, if not better. Need Proof?

"Gordon Bowker, original co-founder of Starbucks, and Tom O'Keefe, Tully's Coffee chairman, chose Silver Cup Coffee as the "Best Cup" two years running in the McCormick & Schmick Cup competition."

Learn more and buy some coffee at www.onecup.org.

Joyce Meyer-false teacher, heresy

2011-02-18T06:19:00.000-08:00

“They’re a sorry bunch--pseudo-apostles, lying preachers, crooked workers--posing as Christ’s agents but sham to the core. And no wonder! Satan does it all the time, dressing up as a beautiful angel of light. So it shouldn’t surprise us when his servants masquerade as servants of God. But they’re not getting by with anything. They’ll pay for it in the end” (2 Corinthians 11:13-15 MSG).

Joyce Meyer is a blaspheming heretic.
You can write me off, or “disown” me, or block me from facebook, or whatever else for saying it.
I fully expect persecution, the Bible makes it clear those who stand for truth will face it, and so be it. I will shout it from the rooftop if necessary. The name of my Lord will not be dragged through the mud without me standing strong against it. Too many are being deceived and it’s scary. Some will get mad at this post-that's ok. In Galations 4:16 Paul asks "Have I then become your enemy by telling you the truth?"

Christians are not to put up with the lies and twisting of the gospel as Joyce Meyer does.
"Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having girded your waist with truth, having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one. "And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God; praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints...." Ephesians 6:10-18

I have armed myself with the armor of God.I will stand only for truth, it girds my waist. I will trust only the Scriptures-it is my sword. I will not tolerate heresy and false teaching. I am not the first to stand for what is right in regards to false teaching. And I won’t be the last. If even one person turns from her teaching, then I’ve done my job. It’s not for me to convince someone-I’m presenting the fact. Only God can change a person’s heart-and I hope you read this with an open mind and heart. I say this stuff not to shame anyone who currently enjoys Joyce-but rather out of love that one might see the truth.

Joyce Meyer is a heretic. She is a false teacher. She looks good (thank you plastic surgery-it's true), even sounds good in most ways, but she is evil. She is NOT of Christ. Before you start defending her, read what she says to be the truth. Read what many others have discovered about her beliefs. Consider her lifestyle. The stuff people “have against her” isn’t made up. It is from her own mouth. It is in the books SHE has written.

If at one point she came up with the craziness she preaches and then repented and sought only the Lord, ok then. But this is CURRENT stuff she believes and teaches.

2 Timothy 4:3-5 says “For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and will run away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths. As for you, always be sober-minded, endure suffering, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry.”

So what do we have here? We have people who want to hear “good” things. People who do not want conviction, rather acceptance and permission. This is exactly what Joyce Meyer gives and all the other prosperity “gospel” preachers. People want to hear “You can be rich!”, “Live the good life now! God wants you to be happy and wealthy” (I guess that’s why she feels ok about living in a multi-million dollar home).

People want to be entertained and made to feel good. That’s exactly what Joyce Meyer does-she’s easy to listen to. She doesn’t make anyone think for themselves.
After Paul warns what this type of preaching will sound like he says “People! Come on already! Use your brain-have some common sense. Stand up for what’s right, speak the truth and do the Will of God.” (That’s my paraphrase)

You know what really burns me up about her? Last century people speaking heresy and blaspheming would have literally been burned at the stakes. But what do Christians in today’s society do? They BUY HER BOOKS! They Go to her conferences! They Subscribe to her magazine and promote her as truth!
I’m not suggesting we should burn her at the stakes-the Bible is clear what will happen to people like Joyce and Joel and many others who are teaching false gospels (Olsteen-don’t even get me started).

Joyce has said some pretty bold things. It would be really hard to make this kinda stuff up, yet people still stand by her and are convinced someone is out to get her. Even after hearing it from her own mouth people somehow think there is a conspiracy to “get” her.

"He could have helped himself up until the point where he said I commend my spirit into your hands. At that point he couldn't do nothing for himself anymore. He had become sin. He was no longer the son of God, he was sin." -Joyce Meyer(From the Cross to the Throne)—Speaking about Jesus.

YIKES! Jesus was no longer the Son of GOD? Where in the world, no, where in the BIBLE does she get that from? Oh wait, she doesn’t NEED the Bible. She claims “"The bible can't even find anyway to explain this. Not really. That's why you gotta get it by revelation. There are no words to explain what I'm telling you. I just trust God that he is putting it into your spirit, like he put it into mine." So she doesn’t need the Bible, she has divine revelation? Hmmmm….interesting. Well it’s either that or the angels. Angel?

Yep angels, “Now spirits don’t have bodies, so we can’t see them. Okay? There probably is, I believe there is, and I certainly hope there is several angels up here this morning that are preaching with me. I believe that right before I speak some anointed statement to you, that one of them bends over and says in my ear what I’m supposed to say to you.”
Joyce Meyer (Witchcraft & Related Spirits (Part 1) – 2 A-27 Audiotape).

How handy to have angels standing around to tell you what to say! Wow. I mean I guess no one can say she doesn’t since they are invisible, no wait, we CAN say she doesn’t. That is NOT Biblical. Sure, we are told there are angel about, but not telling you what to preach.

Another “revelation” our friend Joyce has received is on hell. "Well here comes Jesus into hell. Now I don't know what hell looks like, but God gave me a few ideas. Its hot, fire hot. But at the same time its cold and clammy. Thats kinda different isn't it. Fire hot, but cold and clammy."-Joyce Meyer

She claims that Jesus was tormented for 3 days in hell, and THAT'S where our sins were paid for. By saying this, she says that the cross was not enough. She claims that the devil and his demons “got up on him”, and that after 3 days and nights God got "himself together" and sent His spirit into hell so Jesus could be raised.

That’s crazy. She really is bold-claiming to have knowledge on hell and what occurred during the 3 days Jesus was dead. But you know what, even if she doesn’t know much about hell now, she’ll know plenty about it later on. There is only one place for teachers like her.

There are few words to describe the frustration I have about this topic. People who should know better are giving in to her teachings. In 2 Corinthians 11 Paul rebuked the people for falling prey to false teaching. Verse 4 “For if someone comes and proclaims another Jesus than the one we proclaimed, or if you receive a different Spirit from the one you received, or if you accept a different gospel from the one you accepted, you put up with it readily enough”. They were believing all kinds of non-sense. And so are people now-Joyce preaches a different gospel. She claims Jesus BECAME sin, that he had to go to hell and suffer. And people are putting up with it.

Later on in the chapter (2 Corinthians 11) Paul speaks about how sneaky false apostles are, disguising themselves and making it look like they are angels of light. Joyce says just enough RIGHT to cover up her lies. She throws in a verse here and there to make it seem legit. Of course she’s not going to admit to making it all up and being joined with the devil! She will hid in the darkness.

Christians are to test teachers and ensure they are from God. 1 John 4:1 speaks about such things. We wouldn’t be warned and told to be on guard if there weren’t going to be those who looked good, but actually spoke lies. I love John MacArthur’s commentary on this verse-he says “Christians are to have a healthy skepticism regarding any teaching, unlike some among John’s congregations who were too open minded to anyone claiming a new teaching regarding the faith. Christians are to be like the Bereans who, as students of the word, examined the Scriptures to determine truth and error.

False prophets/teachers are “physical expressions of demonic, spiritual sources” –John MacArthur. This is exactly what Ephesians 6:12 speaks of “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.”

This is evil. This is preparation for the anti-Christ. This is not a game or just a lady who has it a bit mixed up. Stop waiting around for evil to appear in a long black robe. Stop waiting for evil to speak on the name of another religion. Wake up and realize what’s happening right under your nose.
Joyce preaches a different gospel, NOT the true good news of the Bible. She says Jesus took our place in Hell. Wrong. He took our place on the cross. He said “It is finished”. Did Jesus lie? Well possibly, I suppose since he then became sin. (sarcasm noted).

The Bible warns of those who speak a different truth other than that given to Christian. Joyce is preaching another gospel. She makes it sound good, she makes it sound “almost” right. But we are warned of people who come up with new doctrines in Acts 17. If someone is saying something no one has ever heard of before, and it can not be found in the Bible. DO NOT BELIEVE IT. It is heresy.

Look, maybe you’re one of these people who have been “blessed” by her teaching. I don’t care if you’re blessed be the devil himself, it’s still WRONG. Maybe you’ve listened to her teaching for years and never knew it. Come to terms that you’ve been deceived. Turn from the false teaching and search the scripture. Test everything you hear. Don’t allow anyone to tell you anything other than what is in the Bible.
Joyce does a very good job of deceiving people. She does a good job of getting people to like her, and then to get them to pay for her million dollar homes and Bentleys. Don’t even get me started on her extravagant lifestyle—her multimillion dollar home could sponsor approximately 85,571 children through Compassion International, or World Vision. But she’d rather keep it for herself.
Stay away from Joyce Meyers and other heretics. She is using the Bible to make money. Stop buying her ridiculous books which are nothing more than glorified self-help and find your meaning in a life spent with God.
Stop listening to her nonsense and reading her articles. Unsubscribe from her “thought of the day” e-mails, and stop sending her money for her “ministry”---aka fuel for her JET (She does not deny having a jet). Have no part in the lies she spews. She is partnering with Satan and that alone should make one turn from any of her teaching.

It honestly grieves me. People who should know better are backing up Joyce as if she were Paul the apostle. Do NOT side with her. That is dangerous territory-siding with the devil. Make your allegiance only with Christ. Only on the authority of scripture, not imaginary angels whispering in your ear.
Find out what you’re really listening to, whoever it is. Test everything you hear-make sure it aligns with scripture. And Speak out against false teachers and preachers. The weaker in the faith need to be warned and need to know. Everyone needs to be aware.

If someone were to tell me right now that one of the preachers I respect was teaching heresy-I would search it, find out. And yes, if I heard or read them saying things like "The minute that blood sacrifice was accepted Jesus was the first human being that was ever born again. It was sealed. It happened when he was in hell." -Joyce Meyer—then yes I would refuse them to be of God, no matter how much I didn’t want to believe it.

Christians ARE NOT supposed to wait idly around watching the flowers grow. We have strict orders from our Commander in Chief. We are absolutely supposed to call out false teachers and heretics. We are supposed to be looking out for each other to ensure one hasn’t fallen into corruption, and if they have to bring them back to the faith.

Joyce Meyer is twisting the name our my Lord and Savior and using it to create for herself a heaven on earth of sorts. She says she doesn’t want to have to wait to get to heaven….good thing, she’s gonna be waiting a long time. And I will not sit on the sidelines. As I said earlier, I fully expect people to disagree. And I hope it stirs up enough curiosity that someone looks into her teaching more deeply and discovers the heresy.

Listen here to hear Joyce's beliefs straight from her own mouth:

“Stand up stand up for Jesus, ye soldiers of the cross, life HIGH his royal banner, it must not suffer loss, From victory unto victory his army shall he lead, till every foe is vanquished, and Christ is Lord indeed.” George Duffield, Jr.

Want to know God's Will? That's easy.

2011-02-13T12:43:00.000-08:00

Although the title of this post is absolutely true, this isn't just a topical post but a ChristianAudio.com book review on Found God's Will by John MacArthur.

This book is short but excellent. Before listening to this book I didn't realize how simple it really is to discern God's will. I don't know why or what led me into thinking that God's will was difficult to discern or in some way secret but the book assured me that I was not alone in this type of thinking.

Before I get into the steps in discerning God's will that are outlined in the book, I want to discus a couple of quotes from the book that I feel are relevant among many Christians today.

"You say that you don't know what God's will is, but I'll tell you what it is. First, that you know Christ and then, that your neighbors hear about Christ. That is his will. So often we sit around twiddling our thumbs, dreaming about God's will in some far distant future, when we are not even willing to stand up on our own two feet, walk down the street, and do God's will right now.....Evangelism isn't just the preacher's job. It is yours."

Why seek God's will on a particle issue while ignoring God's obvious will and commands on things he wants you to do? God calls all his children to be involved in evangelism, to be involved in caring for orphans and widows, to be involved in world missions. As Paul Washer put it in a sermon I heard, "you are either called to go down in the well, or to hold the rope for others who go down. Either way you should have scars on your hands. What has the great commission cost you?"

Which leads me to the next quote from the book that I would like to share.

"Suffering is linked with faith. The bible never sees a Christian at anytime who doesn't suffer....If you are waltzing through life comfortably, it either means that you are not living a Godly life or you are living it out in the bushes somewhere, where the ungodly world cannot see it."

God's will is that we would be..

1. Saved

2. Spirit-Filled

3. Sanctified

4. Submissive

5. Suffering

*The book gives in-depth analysis and scriptural backing for each of these.

If these 5 things are true about your life do whatever you want.("If you are the right you, you can follow your desires and you will fulfill His will.") This is based off of Psalm 37:4 "Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart."

So basically, if you are a Christian and you are living a life submissive to the Lord, he will give you desires that fit in with his will. You see this all the time when people say they were led into the mission field or any type of service. Me and Deb believe we were led into becoming foster parents. In the light of reading this book I would say that through trying to submit and love Jesus we were given the desire to care for orphans directly.

All in all, this book is excellent and relevant to every Christian's life. The audio reading of the book was also superb.

My Trip to Nineveh

2011-02-10T06:32:00.000-08:00

In church last Sunday(Jan 30th) I heard a convicting sermon on Evangelism. The sermon was based on the 4th chapter of John and one of the points that convicted me was my need to see things spiritually, have spiritual eyes as Pastor Matt put it. The sermon can be listened to here if you are interested in hearing the precursor to this post.

"Evangelism for Dummies"

This sermon really stayed with me through the week and on Friday morning, I discussed it with some men from church. I think this was all preparing me for what would happen just a few hours later. The court hearing for our foster daughters.

Since foster parents don't really have rights in "the system", there were points that I was asked to sit out in the hallway. During one of these times God called me to Nineveh, at least, that is how it felt. This happened when the girls birth father was asked to sit out in the hall with me. Just me and him, in a small tight hallway sitting in chairs just feet from each other. This is a man that my fleshly desire so strongly wants me to hate. A man who I believe should be in prison for a long long time. The man who did unspeakable things to the girls we love and care for.....I sit quietly.....

God puts the thought in mind.....were you any less a sinner before I redeemed you?

I started thinking about the sermon. Am I to have spiritual eyes now? A thought popped in my head from the veggie tales Jonah movie that goes something like this. "But they are fish slappers!"

Then I started to think about a sermon from a few weeks ago. How Jesus got the woman alone at the well. Well, now I'm alone with him.

Then he spoke.

I didn't think he would want to talk with me. I sure didn't want to talk to him. He asked me to take care of the girls. After I assured him that me and Deb are taking good care of them. He said he had been praying and thanked God. ARGH! I had to say something.

So I asked him, when you say you pray, who is it that you are praying to?(As sincerely and politely as I possibly could) He told me that he is a Sunni-Muslim. Now when I think back I realize he didn't really answer my question, but I digress. In turn I told him that I believe in Jesus. He responded by saying that he also believes in Jesus(this is a common rebuttle I hear from Muslims). He went on to clarify that he believes that Jesus lived on earth as a prophet. God gave me the words to be very direct with this man. I told him that we believe that Jesus is God and that we are trying to teach the girls to put their trust in him.

Why I brought the girls into it at this point, I don't know. Would he be offended by this? Would it make him angry?

Oddly, he thanked me. He said that he was Christian at one point and that being a "baptist" was part of his journey. So I asked him why he became a Muslim. He responded by saying that he needs the structure of having to pray and read every morning and that most Christians don't really do anything except maybe go to church. It turns out we agree on something. So I told him that many people who call themselves Christians have never really been saved, and that when God truly saves you, you do pray and read your bible. Not because there are rules saying that you have to, but because you love Jesus.

He then said that all that really matters is that you believe in God. I told him that I didn't plan on getting into a deep religious debate but that Jesus, who he admitted to be a prophet, said that he is the way, the truth and the life and that no man can come to the Father except through him. He told me that he did believe in hell and paradise. So, I told him that since Jesus says that he is the only way, I couldn't accept his view that the only thing that matters is that you believe in God and that Jesus is the only way to be saved. He didn't really respond.

So, out of curiousity, and some uncanny boldness I typically don't have, I asked him if I could ask him something. Typing that sounds dumb but it was one of those precursors into a big personal question that I felt the need to give. After he gave me the go ahead, I asked him what he wanted to see happen with the girls. Honestly, I couldn't even understand why he was there. Apparently, he didn't fully grasp his reasoning either. Because his answer was, "honestly I don't even know.". But, he went on to say that he thought the girls might be best off with me and Deb. After, I mentioned that the goal wasn't for us to keep the girls, he went into a tirade about how he is left in the dark on everything. This led into an all out pity party that was finalized by trying to tell me that he was basically forced into taking a deal stating that he was guilty. With some of my earlier politeness dropped, I asked "so you are claiming that you are innocent?". After he told me that he was innocent, I pretty much stopped the conversation there. He obviously wasn't ready to deal with his guilt.

After leaving that hallway I felt blessed to have shared my hope in Jesus. I don't know if this man will ever repent and cling to Jesus, but perhaps our encounter will cause him to think, and through that thinking God will give him a new heart so he can truly repent and believe.

God knows and he is in control. One thing I know is that God worked in me through the experience and I am longing to share the word again.

God's love

2011-02-08T19:09:00.000-08:00

The past couple days/week have been emotionally tumultuous for me and today was no different. Not every moment is saturated in deep emotional feelings, but it seems that playing constantly in the background is a churning of uneasiness.

I received a phone call today while I was out working. It’s the kind of phone call that stops you dead in your tracks. My heart instantly sank way deep into my stomach and I felt like I could become sick. I was honestly speechless for a moment or two and apologized to the person for the silence. My mind couldn’t even formulate words to go on with the conversation. I stumbled over several words before saying “this is really hard for me to hear.”

My worst fears had been confirmed. This is the stuff nightmares are made of…and it all feels so hopeless. I mean, things like this just shouldn’t be happening. It’s just not right.

Once I got off the phone I could feel my anger rising. It was a sort of righteous anger at the horrific injustice done. It was an anger aimed at the sick individuals who steal innocence, anger because too many wrong things have happened.

But as quickly as the anger came, it went, and sorrow and sadness replaced it. I began to weep and sigh as I realized the immensity of the situation.

There were calls to make and an appointment was set for a worker to come to our home.

These types of "emergency" meetings aren't easy. Besides it interrupting our normal flow of evening activity (getting everyone home, school work done, dinner, baths, etc.), it’s draining. Talking about things that should never happen only makes the reality harder to deal with.

The DHS worker came out as planned, paperwork was completed and the rest of the process was gone over.

And somewhere at the end of the visit-our conversation turned to God and where our faith walk has taken us---namely into foster care/social work. She is a believer too!
And in the moment that I made the connection of being joint heirs with Christ, I thought “Wow. God really loves me.” The relationship was undeniable, we didn’t need to share our testimonies or confirm doctrinal statements, we are sisters in Christ. And the bond that brings is beautiful. Talking about our God and the joy He brings was awesome.

You see, some find His love in their nice homes, or kids, or good jobs, or other material blessings, and sure those are all good things. But God knew this was a tough situation and loved me enough to do something as “simple” as set up the DHS worker who’d be coming out to deal with this, to be my sister in Christ.

We talked about what it meant to be in full time ministry I was once again in awe of my God. We talked about His calling and going where He leads. We talked about relying on His strength and how hopeless a life without Him would be.

This woman wasn’t one of those “church” Christians, and in fact we talked about how meaningless a life like that is. She was passionate, she was in love with Jesus and knew the power of His love.
To stand in my living room with a complete stranger, yet be united in such an awesome way could, by some, be viewed as a coincidence….but I have another idea.

God loves me! He sent a sister in Christ to walk beside me on such a day like today to aid us through this situation. He sent her to understand what very few can understand. He sent her to encourage me and to speak words of truth that my mind couldn’t seem to grasp today.
He sent me an answer to a prayer I hadn’t even thought of. In my feeble mind I couldn’t get past “Please let this NOT have happened.” But that isn’t the way it works.

He loves me and sent me someone to encourage me and lift me up, so that I could do what I needed to do as a mom.

Things could have gone very differently, and it wouldn’t mean God loves me any less. But today He gave me this blessing and I am very very thankful.

God loves me!

Review of 'Jesus in the Present Tense'

2011-01-28T11:43:00.000-08:00

ChristianAudio.com Audio review of

Jesus in the Present Tense,

by Warren Wiersbe

Read by Maurice England

Part One- The Book

This book was very expositional, which I love. I don't think any points where made in the book without giving ample scriptural support. The topic of the book simply Jesus, and living our lives in Him. The book explains Jesus as our Lord and the unity we have in Christ. It also gives Christians the goal of Loving the Lost based on our relation as sheep needing a Shepherd. As anyone who has read anything I have posted before you will see that I love to pull quotes from the books that "hit home" with me. Here is one of those quotes.

"To claim to be one of His sheep, and yet not follow Him. Is either to lie or to rebel, and both are terrible sins."

This quote in the context of the chapter in the book reminds me that when I sin, it is a direct rebellion against the good Shepherd who loves me, protects me, and laid down his life for me.

Part Two- The Reading

I was not a fan of the reading of this book. I listen while I do other things, which typically isn't a problem for me at all. But, this reader had little inflection in his voice and it was tough at parts to really heed what he was saying. I do understand that it can be a challenge at times for the reader to add inflection without interpretation when dealing with the amount of scripture this book uses. With that said though, I have heard it done well on other books.

Overall, this is a good book. I only gave it three stars because the reading wasn't my favorite, otherwise I would have given it four.

Quick! Throw me a hamburger-I’m drowning!

2011-01-26T06:11:00.000-08:00

I really am not that creative of a person so bear with me while I illustrate my point.

Say you’re on a boat with someone else. Let’s make it a little fishing boat with a motor. You ride out way into the ocean and somehow you fall overboard. You’re not a very good swimmer and never could pass that treading test they make you take to be able to go in the deep side of a pool.

You are thrashing about and trying to reach up and grab something. Your friend who was also in the boat with you sees that you’ve fallen in.

You realize though that you’re really hungry. Despite the violent waves and fear that you are going to drown your stomach feels like an empty pit.

Yelling out you say, “Quick! Throw me a hamburger! I’m drowning!” Huh? Why in the world would you care about eating when you’re about to die?

That is just silly, of course you would need to be saved first and then worry about eating later. Being rescued from certain death would probably be your first priority.

You wouldn’t be thinking “oh gee, I have to pay the water bill” or “I need to return my book to the library”. Instead, SAVE ME would be your only concern.

Ok, enough of the analogy. Friend, you are going to die. It is absolutely going to happen. You are sinking into a deep dark pit. Everyday that passes brings you closer to the death of your human body. For many this is a grim reality.

But so many of these un-saved people are worrying about the things that don’t matter. Was the man hungry and should he eat? Yes. Does he need to pay his bills and return his library book? Yes. But all in due time-once he’s saved.

There are people running around in the church signing up for all kinds of things, from choir to childrens programs to teaching classes, which are important once one is saved. Before that-nothing else matters.

Participating in ministries, doing the “right” things (going to church), even reading your Bible are all second to the conversion from dead to saved.

Before I was saved I was involved in lots of church activities. I would really try to read my Bible and I’d really try to love God and do the things He wanted me to. I’d try to love Him. I knew all the stories and knew the answers I should say about salvation. But I was still lost, I was dead, drowning, I was un-saved.

I knew scriptures but even the devil can quote from the Bible so that really won’t get you anywhere (don’t get me wrong, being in the Word is vital to a believer’s walk). It’s kinda like if you were thrown a pool noodle while sinking-it would give you a false sense of security. It would feel as if you were going to be ok, but in a moment’s time, with one strong wave that toy would be gone and ultimately you’d still be drowning. There are lots of things that can be a useless as a pool noodle-growing up in a Christian home, going to church, even praying a prayer or having someone tell you you’re saved. Without the grace of God and true repentance you are still drowning.

All too often Christian use materialistic things and occurrences to “confirm” their salvation. “OH, well I got the job I’ve been praying for, so God must hear me.” Or people will say things like “Look how blessed by God I am! I have a nice job, nice home, happy family, I must be a Christian”; but in reality they are not at peace with God. They are still drowning.

Suppose now, while drowning you asked for a towel; again how idiotic that would be. Likewise, to ask for a blanket because the water is cold would be just as useless. A towel or a blanket wouldn’t make any difference at all, you’d still be drowning.

Same goes for asking for gifts from the Spirit-before salvation it is pointless to ask for things that WILL be given to you when He enters your life.

Oswald Chambers talks about this in his book Biblical Psychology; “Love for God does not spring naturally out of the human heart; but it is open to us to choose whether we will have the love of God imparted to us by the Holy Spirit”…the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us” (Romans 5:5; see also Luke 11:13). We are emphasizing just now the need of voluntary choice. It is of no use to pray, “O Lord, for more love! Give me love like Thine; I do want to love Thee better,” if we have not begun at the first place, and that is to choose to receive the Holy Spirit who will shed abroad the love of God in our hearts.” It is not necessary to pray for Love but rather receive the Holy Spirit and love will be given.

Suppose the drowning man asked for a band aid for a cut he had. It would be irrational to care for such things before being saved. Some people ask for healing from an illness (for themselves or loved ones) but will still be dead. Healing, wealth, relationships-it is all meaningless compared with the saving grace of God.
Why ask for Peace? HE is peace? Why ask for love? HE is love.

I’m not eloquent, I can’t give perfectly planned out illustrations but I can say this:
Get things right-cry out to Jesus for salvation. Nothing else matters. Not membership, not tithing, not friendships, not anything.

If you strip off everything and jump back in, what will happen? Will you sink?
If you’re saved, you are rooted, anchored even and can not fall back into the murky water of sin and death.
Drop the ministries, quit the choir, stop pretending, let go of everything. What remains? A few years ago, for me I would have said “nothing”. Now I can say “everything”.

I know from experience how foolish it is to ask for a hamburger before being saved. I know how futile it is to try and dry off while still in the water. I wasted a lot of time splashing and flopping about when instead I could have been serving Him.

Praise GOD He reached out and saved me. I am awed daily by the change that occurred in my life. I lived a life of hypocrisy; thinking I was saved, acting like I was saved-but unbeknownst to me (the heart is truly deceitful) I was completely insincere and I was still headed for Hell. But when salvation came it changed everything.

As soon as I was saved, His arms dried me, His love warmed me. He fed me. Thank you Jesus for saving me when all I was asking for was a towel.

Young Christians are Very Few but Fervant

2011-01-20T11:50:00.000-08:00

I've learned a lot of interesting things about my generation over the past couple weeks while listening to an audio book named after people in my generation(born 1980-2000) called the Millennials. I've done a review for it here at ChristianAudio.com.

Anyway, in this post I want to go over some of the facts and statistics from this very thorough study of the Millenials in regards to Christianity.

First, the sad news. The study showed evidence that only about 15% of millenials could be considered practicing the Christian or Catholic faith. (I.E- they go to church, read the bible). But the numbers actually get worse, according to the study, only 6 percent of Millennials could be described as evangelicals which included believing the bible to be complete Truth and the word of God. Of that group, 65 percent said their faith is important to them. So, less than 4 percent of Millennials, by their own testimony, believe the bible is completely true and that their faith is important in their lives.

Can a true believer not consider their faith as important?

"So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple."- Luke 14:33

"The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and covered up. Then in his joy he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field" -Matthew 13:44

These are just a couple verses that show the value of being God's disciple. I don't see how one could possibly be a true believer and not view their faith as of infinite importance.

With the number of true evangelical believers likely being lower than 4 percent in my generation, which happens to be the largest generation the nation has ever seen. Does the future of Christianity in America look bleak?

I would say, no.

In fact, the future of Chrisitanity might be brighter than it has ever been in our country. The following are a group of quotes from the book that lead me to think that the true believers of our generation might be the most fervant our country has seen in a long time or ever. As the New Testament clearly shows, it doesn't take many fearless, devoted believers to turn the world upside down.

"On the otherhand those who are Christians demonstrate fervancy about their faith as we will discuss at the end of this chapter. The few may actually be more potent for Christianity then the many of previous generations. Hear the words of Melanie, she expresses this sentiment well.

"I am a Christian" She says frankly. "I have repented of my sins and placed my faith in Jesus Christ. I have no doubt that I will go to heaven when I die." She pauses and gets her breath. "Look I know that most of the people in my generation are not Christians. I was not raised in a Christian home so I know that perspective." Melanie then looks us right in the eyes, "And I know that being a Christian these days comes with a cost." She says with greater emphasis. "In some parts of the world, you can lose your life for being a Christian. What I am trying to say is that I have counted the cost for my beliefs, I'm ready and willing to do whatever it takes to follow Jesus. I've seen to many cultural Christians in churches that don't have a clue. I'm not playing games, I'm serious and I'm ready to take a stand for Him no matter what the cost."

Churches that are serious about reaching this generation must become serious missional churches. Millenials, like Melanie, don't have any patience with anything less than total committment."

Another quote from the book.

"What we learned about this relitively small number of millenial christians is that they are passionate about their faith. They have no patience for business as usual. They see the urgent need to share the gospel and to start new churches and they will not wait on tired established churches to get the work done."

Lesley is not alone.

""I'm not anti-church." Lesley explained to us, Lesley grew up in a Christian home. She appreciates her parents clear convictions and sacrificial service in the church where they continue today. "But so much of what takes place in my parents church is just keeping the doors open. Pay the staff, keep the building nice, and give ten percent or more of the churches income for someone else to do missions." She told us almost breathlessly. "But that's plodding Christianity" she continued, "It has no urgency about it. It's more concerned with the people in the church then those outside the church. It breaks my heart that people are going to hell each day while so many churches have members that argue over Roberts rules of order, or which members will serve on the personnel committee, we just don't have time for such foolishness."

Neither is this Millenial

"I guess I am one of a small number in my generation that grew up going to church. I love my parents and I appreciate the fact that they showed so much love for our church. But I'm just not where they are in regards to the local church and missions." We asked him to clarify that last statement. "Well, for my parents missions means giving to the church, which will then send funds for other to do mission work. They believe they have been obedient when they give their money for someone else to do the work. Don't get me wrong, I want churches to give a lot of their funds for mission work, its not that part that I question, its just that when all we do is give our money, its not enough. We need to be involved in missions around the world. We need to be getting our hands and feet dirty. We need to be personally involved as well as giving. If you take the bible seriously, you've got to love people, but you've got to demonstrate that love. That's why we are serious about missions and that's why we are serious about adoption. Most Christians want to ignore James 1:27."

I've heard similar comments to these made by Rebecca's before, its sad, but often true.

""I call it baby boomer reflux" said Rebecca. The outspoken 26 year old clarified. "The boomers give money to the church, but it comes right back to them to keep them content. They hire the staff to do the ministry they won't do. The money goes to make the buildings more comfortable, for them. And then churches do all kinds of ministries for boomers and their families to keep them happy. That's not New Testament Christianity, that's a religious social club.""

A common theme of the book was that "The Millennials are coming". In regards to the Church, this is a good thing. As I mentioned in a previous post, I agree that too many of our so-called churches are no longer life saving stations but just social clubs. The real Church will thrive with the incoming Millenials. But, I'll close this post with another quote from the book which describes what I believe will happen to the social clubs.

"Some churches in America will likely continue to decline and weaken because their leaders and members refuse to get out of their comfort zones. These churches will continue to have mediocre bible study groups and anemic preaching. Not only will these churches fail to attract the non-christian millenials, they will forfeit the opportunity to reach millenial christians. Christians who are members of America's largest generation will not embrace churches where the bible is not taught and preached with depth and convictions."

Confessions of a mom of 5

2011-01-17T07:34:00.000-08:00

Confessions of a Mom of 5

Four and a half years ago I became a mom. At that time I found out that being a mommy is as great as everyone makes it out to be. My little boy coming into the world changed everything. Things that didn’t matter before, mattered. Things I placed on my priority list, suddenly got thrown on the back burner.

Almost a year ago, I became a mom of 5. There are of course countless ways that being a foster mom, or being a mom to kids of a different race, or being a mom of special needs kids is very, very different than normal parenting. But this post isn’t about all that seriousness; it’s about being a mom to FIVE kids. The complications that go along with having five, I’ve found out are much different than having one or two.

When you have your first kid, everyone just assumes you’ll have a second. When you have a second people wonder if you’ll go for a third. When you have three, people assume you’re done having children-because anything beyond three would just be absurd.

Having four kids can seem a little “much” but once you hit 5 or above-you just have TOO many kids (according to the general public as I interpret it!). I have gotten some very strange responses when I answer “5” to the question “how many children do you have”.

I’ve gotten-“OH! You look too young to have 5!!” I am. :)
Some have said, “Oh, my neighbor’s daughter has five”-as if they are realizing they now know 2 people experiencing the phenomena of having 5 kids.

Many think that having 5 (or more) is just TOO MANY-it's weird, what person in their right mind would have five kids?

Just recently John and I were out with 3 of the kids, and I saw a family with probably 6 or so-and I thought “man they have a lot of kids!” Funny how my perspective changes as soon as I’m within “normal” limits!

Things have changed in our home since adding two more- especially since we went from 2 kids to 5 in a matter of three months.

We can no longer “slip” into the back of a service or drop by somewhere, even if my children are being well behaved we cause too much of a commotion for those things anymore. We usually increase the population of any given event by 5-10%.

I realized very quickly that having this many children command a lot of unwanted attention and observation. Sometimes I see someone staring-and many times it is because Shayla is just the most beautiful little girl they’ve ever seen, but most times it’s because they’re counting heads! At least someone is keeping track for us! 

One of the first things to change was plates. Yep, plates. I care WAY more about my time, John’s time, and our time together than I care about the environment-therefore, we use paper plates pretty much every night. Shame on me!
We do not have a dishwasher-and plates from breakfast, lunch and all the little stuff in between add up to more than two sinkfuls per day. I’m not about to stand in front of the sink washing plates for 7 people after dinner. I buy paper plates by the hundreds-it lasts about 2 weeks.

Another thing that changed is my view of the toilet. Look, we have 6 people using the “potty”. And since our almost 3 year old is currently potty training-she’s in there a lot.
Ever heard the motto “If it’s yellow let it mellow, if it’s brown flush it down”? It makes sense and we have embraced it. If everyone is lining up for their last bathroom trip before bed-why flush 4 times when we can just flush once? Some might argue it’s not sanitary or something…as long as no one’s falling into the toilet we’re good (although, there’s no guarantee that won’t happen, some of our kids have little bums!)

Look, my water bill can easily be over $150 between baths, showers, laundry, etc. I gotta save every way I can! I haven’t stooped as low as to recycle bath water-but I cram as many kids into one bath as possible (max. is my 3 in the same tub-it’s cramped but they think it is fun!)!

Being a mom of five kids means that my house is loud. Even if the kids are playing nicely and semi-quietly, there are still five of them, and the noise adds up. It seems like there is always an underlying hum and chatter. And when some of them are fighting or crying or singing, things are VERY loud. I’ve basically given up on answering my phone when I’m around my kids. I’ll call you back after 8 pm!

Being a mom of five has given me a new wish. Some days I wish my kids would act up and get in a bit of trouble-just so they can be sent to bed early and the quiet and relaxing can begin sooner! Don’t get me wrong, I don’t look for ways to punish them with an early bedtime, but if it happens, it happens!

My perspectives have changed as well. I’ve been a mom of two kids before, and from what I can remember-it was pretty easy. At the time, I probably thought it was difficult, but hindsight is 20/20. I mean, there was just two of them. John could hold one of their hands, I could hold another. Or if I was by myself I had a hand for each.

Now I have to carry Elliott in one arm and try to grab the hoods of the three other ones to make sure everyone is getting across the street safely.

Recently while waiting for Russ to get out of school I overheard two dads talking about their holidays. One commented “yeah, it’s hard to get to see family because we have the two of them now…” I can not help but chuckle. It’s involuntary for me to smile and think-TWO? TWO? I can do that in my sleep!

Don’t get me wrong, I know for some people two is a lot of work. For me though (especially now), taking care of two feels like a walk in the park.

With 5 kids (2 with special needs) we average 3 appointments per week. Sometimes up to 6. There are dentist and doctor, school programs and meetings, therapists, evaluations, social workers visits, court ordered visits, and don’t forget the veterinarian. It keeps things just busy enough. I don’t even pretend that I can keep everything organized in my head. I can barely keep a single day straight let a lone a whole week!

Since becoming a mommy of five, I have a new appreciation for people with more than 5 kids. I recently met a young woman with 6. They adopted 3 kids from Africa when their youngest was around 4 (praise GOD!). I like meeting and knowing people like that, because it makes me feel less “weird” It makes me know someone can understand what it’s like to have a lot of kids. Meeting people like her gives me the opportunity to look at her like people look at me “Well! At least I don’t have THAT many kids!” :)

Having 5 kids means even our minivan looks like a clown car. Recently someone commented that John and I are one of the few who ACTUALLY need a third row-or enough seating for 7. For most people having a van means their kids can sit where they want, or they have extra space. For us it means we can all ride in the same vehicle.

I’ve been asked for a ride before, and when I’ve said “there’s no room” they looked at me as if I was just being rude-then they poked their head in the car and exclaim “oh! You really are all packed in!” I’m thinking-there’s a spot on the floor!

Around here, if something is funny, it sounds like the play button was pushed on a laugh box-these kids can explode into laughter at the littlest thing! The laughter of five kids can be heard around the block!

On most car rides we listen to music and everyone sings a long. I like to think of us as The Crosley Choir; still hoping for a label to pick us up. :)

Having 5 kids means you can play a pretty convincing game of “house”, or “school” or even re-enact an episode of The Brady Bunch.

Having 5 kids means things go FAST. A tube of toothpaste lasts 1 week. A pack of hot dogs gets us through one meal. And don’t even get me started on toilet paper.

Having 5 kids means 10 hands to bundle up in the snow, 10 boots to get on and 100 nails to keep cut (the 8 year old and John can do their own!).

Having 5 kids means a full trash bag of trash every day.I have to laugh when I see trash set out for collection, and there is ONE bag!

There are three different schools to get kids off to in the mornings and about 10 teachers to interact with.

John and I have never been ones to get overwhelmed easily. You won’t hear us use our kids as an excuse to not do something very often. We make it work-there are many who are much more stressed out by having two kids, than we are at having 5.

I jokingly say “two, I’d like two” when I’m involved in a conversation with someone about how many kids they’d like to have. I never imagined having five and most people would imagine our life being much more hectic and complicated than it is…

To tell the truth though, I like having five kids and would even consider six or seven! If it’s the Lord’s will, I pray He gives us two more children. There are so many children in need and I would love to welcome two children into our home forever.

Many have said “I don’t know how you do it”-it’s honestly not as difficult as one might think. Children (even with the whining, fighting, tempers and moodiness) truly are a blessing from the Lord, and I’m bless 5 times over.

Review of 'Think'

2011-01-06T14:00:00.000-08:00

ChrisitianAudio.com Audio review of
Think
The Life of Mind and the Love of God
Author: John Piper
Narrator: Wayne Shepherd

I found this book to be a really good listen. Early in the book, I was disappointed because it seemed to simply be a discourse between the two arguing camps of evangelicals about the importance of deep intellectual thought and the gospel. While this is a large part and reason for the book, that I eventually found enlightening and edifying, there is a deeper purpose to the book that is rooted in the fact that we are to love God will all our mind. This quote from the book sums up this thought.

"Knowing God is the root of loving God. The main reason that thinking and loving are connected is that we cannot love God without knowing God and the way we know God is by the spirit enabled use of our minds. So, to love God with all your mind means engaging all your powers of thought to know God as fully as possible in order to treasure him for all he is worth."

That quote, along with this entire section of the book is enough for me to encourage others to listen to this book.

Another section of the book that was very educational for me was the dangers of relativism. Now, I've known for a while that Relativism is wrong and essentially evil but John Piper throughly shows relativism to not only be false, but prideful and ultimately enslaving.

Wayne Shepherd also does a great job in the reading.

Book Review of 'Justified by Faith Alone'

2010-12-15T10:42:00.000-08:00

Recently I was accepted in to a review program at ChristianAudio.com, so periodically I will be posting reviews of books that I have listened to as part of this program.

ChrisitianAudio.com Audio review of
Justified by Faith Alone, by R. C. Sproul
Read by Sean Runnette

This is a short book, but jammed packed with doctirinal truth. Sproul throughly explains the irreconsible difference in the views on justification between Roman Catholics and Evangelical Christians.

One thing that Sproul did in the book that differs from many who make and display these arguments is that when stating the opposing argument, that of Roman Catholics, he didn't cast it in a negative light. In most cases, he quoted directly from Cathecism or from past Councils. I believe he made every effort to display a fair argument of the Roman Catholic view of justification, then showed how this is in direct contrast to the view of the reformers and modern evangelical Christians.

Sproul showed how in the evangelical case justification is synthetic. While Roman Catholics believe in a Analytic justification. While taking the time to explain what each of these mean and how stark the contrast really is.

One part of the book that I specifically enjoyed was the history of the reformed view and how the Catholic church attacked their view as being antinomian. He then supplied Luther and Calvin's rebuttles. Those rebuttles went something like this, if there aren't any good works then true saving faith was never present to begin with.

An equational breakdown he gave in the book on the different views on justification:

Catholic View
Faith + Works = Justification

Evangelical View
Faith = Justification + Works

Antinomianism
Faith = Justification – Works

One thing I wish he had addressed in this book, (but understand why he didn't) was the fact that many of our current so-called Evangelical churches have slipped into the Catholic view(i.e loss of salvation) or into Antinomianism(i.e Easy Believism).

Overall this was an excellent book with great narration that I would recommend highly.

Too Many Clubs, Too Few Life-Saving Stations

2010-12-13T08:02:00.000-08:00

We were invited over the house of some nice people from our church yesterday and enjoyed some good time of fellowship while our kids and their kids had fun playing together. At some point in the afternoon we were asked the question of what led us to their church. Our answer was something along the lines of wanting to find a church that was baptistic and reformed. That was our simple answer, but the more detailed answer would have included the fact that we were looking for a church that had a biblical approach to discipleship and reaching the lost.

Our church is located in Media, which is about a 25 minute drive from our house. For us this feels like its just around the corner because it seems like we are always driving 45 minutes to Philly for things. Its sad in a way that we never found a church in Norristown that meets these basic criteria of things that we feel that scripture clearly dictates. The following story was written by Theodore Wedel in 1953. It is tragically accurate how it describes what has happened to the church in America.

Parable of the crude little life-saving station (by Dr. Theodore O. Wedel)

On a dangerous sea coast where shipwrecks often occur, there was once a crude little life-saving station. The building was just a hut, and there was only one boat, but the few devoted members kept a constant watch over the sea, and with no thought for themselves, went out day and night tirelessly searching for the lost. Some of those who were saved and various others in the surrounding area wanted to become associated with the station and gave of their time and money and effort for the support of its work. New boats were bought and new crews trained. The little life-saving station grew.

Some of the members of the life-saving station were unhappy that the building was so crude and poorly equipped. They felt that a more comfortable place should be provided as the first refuge of those saved from the sea. They replaced the emergency cots with beds and put better furniture in the enlarged building.

Now the life-saving station became a popular gathering place for its members, and they decorated it beautifully because they used it as a sort of club. Fewer members were now interested in going to sea on life-saving missions, so they hired lifeboat crews to do this work. The life-saving motif still prevailed in the club’s decorations, and there was a liturgical life-boat in the room where the club’s initiations were held. About this time a large ship wrecked off the coast, and the hired crews brought in boat loads of cold, wet and half-drowned people. They were dirty and sick. The beautiful new club was in chaos. So the property committee immediately had a shower house built outside the club where victims of shipwrecks could be cleaned up before coming inside.

At the next meeting, there was a split among the club membership. Most of the members wanted to stop the club’s life-saving activities as being unpleasant and a hindrance to the normal social life of the club. Some members insisted upon life-saving as their primary purpose and pointed out that they were still called a life-saving station. But they were finally voted down and told that if they wanted to save the lives of all the various kinds of people who were shipwrecked in those waters, they could begin their own life-saving station. So they did.

As the years went by, the new station experienced the same changes that had occurred in the old. It evolved into a club, and yet another life-saving station was founded. History continued to repeat itself, and if you visit that sea coast today, you will find a number of exclusive clubs along that shore. Shipwrecks are frequent in those waters, but most of the people drown.

-John

Are You Holy?

2010-11-29T07:57:00.000-08:00

So I've been reading a book called Holiness by J.C Ryle recently. I love his writings. He has a strong way of piercing me with the word of God. Many times throughout the book he has turned to me with a personal question that not only convicts but it pushes me to "press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus." -Philippians 3:14. Anyway, the following question/dialog I read last night, and I thought I would share it.

"Are you holy? Listen, I pray you, to the question I put to you this day. Do you know anything of the holiness of which I have been speaking?

I do not ask whether you attend you church regularly-whether you have been baptized, and received the Lord's Supper-whether you have the name of Christian-I ask something more than all this: Are you holy, or are you not?

I do not ask whether you approve of holiness in others-whether you like to read the lives of holy people, and to talk of holy things, and to have on your table holy books-whether you mean to be holy, and hope you will be holy some day-I ask something further: Are you yourself holy this very day, or are you not?

And why do I ask so straitly, and press the question so strongly? I do it because the Scripture says, "Without holiness no man shall see the Lord." It is written, it is not my fancy-it is the Bible, not my private opinion-it is the word of God, not of man-"Without holiness no man shall see the Lord" (Heb. 12:14).

Alas, what searching, sifting words are these! What thoughts come across my mind, as I write them down! I look at the world, and see the greater part of it lying in wickedness. I look at professing Christians, and see the vast majority having nothing of Christianity but the name. I turn to the Bible, and I hear the Spirit saying, "Without holiness no man shall see the Lord."

Surely it is a text that ought to make us consider our ways, and search our hearts. Surely it should raise within us solemn thoughts, and send us to prayer.

You may try to put me off by saying "you feel much, and think much about these things: far more than many suppose." I answer, "This is not the point. The poor lost souls in hell do as much as this. The great question is not what you think, and what you feel, but what you DO."

You may say, "It was never meant that all Christians should be holy, and that holiness, such as I have described, is only for great saints, and people of uncommon gifts." I answer, "I cannot see that in Scripture. I read that every man who hath hope in Christ purifieth himself" (1 John 3:3)-"Without holiness no man shall see the Lord."

You may say, "It is impossible to be so holy and to do our duty in this life at the same time: the thing cannot be done." I answer, "You are mistaken. It can be done. With Christ on your side nothing is impossible. It has been done by many. David, and Obadiah, and Daniel, and the servants of Nero's household, are all examples that go to prove it."

You may say, "If I were so holy I would be unlike other people." I answer, "I know it well. It is just what you ought to be. Christ's true servants always were unlike the world around them-a separate nation, a peculiar people;-and you must be so too, if you would be saved!"

You may say, "At this rate very few will be saved." I answer, "I know it. It is precisely what we are told in the Sermon on the Mount." The Lord Jesus said so 1,900 years ago. "Strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, that leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it" (Matt. 7:14). Few will be saved, because few will take the trouble to seek salvation. Men will not deny themselves the pleasures of sin and their own way for a little season. They turn their backs on an "inheritance incorruptible, undefiled, and that fadeth not away." "Ye will not come unto Me," says Jesus, "that ye might have life" (John 5:40).

You may say, "These are hard sayings: the way is very narrow." I answer, "I know it. So says the Sermon on the Mount." The Lord Jesus said so 1,900 years ago. He always said that men must take up the cross daily, and that they must be ready to cut off hand or foot, if they would be His disciples. It is in religion as it is in other things, "there are no gains without pains." That which costs nothing is worth nothing.

Whatever we may think fit to say, we must be holy, if we would see the Lord. Where is our Christianity if we are not? We must not merely have a Christian name, and Christian knowledge, we must have a Christian character also. We must be saints on earth, if ever we mean to be saints in heaven. God has said it, and He will not go back: "Without holiness no man shall see the Lord." "The Pope's calendar," says Jenkyn, "only makes saints of the dead, but Scripture requires sanctity in the living." "Let not men deceive themselves," says Owen; "sanctification is a qualification indispensably necessary unto those who will be under the conduct of the Lord Christ unto salvation. He leads none to heaven but whom He sanctifies on the earth. This living Head will not admit of dead members."

Surely we need not wonder that Scripture says "Ye must be born again" (John 3:7). Surely it is clear as noon-day that many professing Christians need a complete change-new hearts, new natures-if ever they are to be saved. Old things must pass away-they must become new creatures. "Without holiness no man," be he who he may, "shall see the Lord.""

-J. C Ryle

Please don't call me ....nice

2010-11-27T17:18:00.000-08:00

I’ve had a lot of things said about me, been called a lot of things, and have accused of a lot of things.

I’ve been referred to as a spineless jellyfish, been told I was irresponsible to have another baby (my sweet Elliott) because I suffered from severe Post Partum Depression/Psychosis with Russ and Shayla (but God spared me this time!), I’ve had mean and untrue things said about me in front of friends, only to have no one come to my defense.

I’ve been gossiped about, talked about mercilessly behind my back and have basically been shunned by many (most of them “Christian”). I’ve been scolded for caring too much about the poor and needy.

I’ve been called “extreme” in my Christian walk, “holier than thou”, judgmental, and arrogant. The term “fanatical” also has been used.

And all these things were said by “Christian” “sisters” and “brothers”.

Once a man pulled up beside me at a red light and cursed me out—because I was going 25 mph….in a 25 mph zone. Go figure.

There are plenty of people who don’t care for me, think I’m unfair and rude and have made it known to me.

These things absolutely hurt me, my heart aches at the thought of how these things have damaged relationships. I can’t stand that someone can’t even look at my baby without feeling a kind of smugness that I don’t/didn’t deserve him. The evilness that lurches around is really scary and Ephesians 6:12 sums it up: “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.”

I don’t tell this all to for someone to have pity on me or to make others look bad. Not my intent at all, because in some way or another, some of these things have a twinge of truth to them. In many of these cases I have completely forgiven and moved on, but it was still said.

But there is something that bothers me way more than these things did.

Statements that really distresses me is this: “You’re such a nice person!”, “You’re doing a good deed”, or something along the lines of being religious. Hearing a comment like this, makes my shoulders drop and my spirit sag a bit.

For by these comments, I know I’ve failed to point to Christ. I’ve come off as doing things by my own strength and not by His. I’ve perhaps been arrogant and selfish in not directing all the glory to Him.

I want to be known as a Christian-a follower of Christ. I want there to be something different about me, not simply that I’m nice.

My friend across the street has said this to me several times about things going on in my life. Sometimes being a foster parent will attract comments like this, or if someone knows how we like to spend our Saturday mornings (LOVE park).

But I don’t do these things because I’m nice. In fact, I don’t view myself as a nice person at all. I’m a grumpy, opinionated, pessimist most of the time, and it’s by God’s grace and mercy that I do anything right at all. And sometimes it’s all I can do to not shake the person who just gave me the compliment and say “I’m not nice! I don’t want to do any of this half the time but I love Jesus and it’s Him that compels me to love!” But that may be awkward.

2 Corinthians 2:14 would be a good verse for me to memorize and say in response—“For the love of Christ compels us, because we have concluded this: that one has died for all, therefore we have all died; and he died for all, that those who life might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised.”

Paul says exactly what I mean in that verse-“it’s the pressure that causes action” (MacArther commentary). I love because His love compels me. Not because I’m nice.

John 15: 4-5 says, “Remain in me, and I will remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”

Oh how true. As soon as I remove myself from the vine (Him) and try to do things on my own, I fail. I get angry, impatient, lazy, unmotivated. But when I’m relying on Him and His spirit is doing the work through me, much is accomplished.

Because I know how terrible I am, and what can be done by Him, I can speak of His power in ways many can’t understand, because they aren’t remaining in the vine. Doing things of your own will and strength is nothing more than filthy rags.

So often my motives are right (to serve Him) but my execution is wrong and I lead people to believe I’m doing something right. I fail to shine only for myself and not for Him.

When people say “You’re so nice to help those people”---I’ve failed to provoke questions about what makes me do these things, what makes me different.

One of my favorite verses is 1 Peter 3:15-16 because it talks about exactly that. It says “But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give a reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander.”

Why would someone ask me about my hope if I don’t live in such a way to trigger such a question? My life must demand the question “what makes you do these things?”, instead of making me out to be a nice person.

I hope the people who have said things about me look foolish to those hearing it. I hope my life has been different enough that people know the truth about what I do and not believe what someone has decided to say about me.

Basically, I want the world to see Christ. Not me. I don’t want to seem like a nice person, because that’s too easy. Doing something because it seems “right” is fine, but doing something because Christ’s love compels you is what pleases the Lord. So don’t call me nice! 

What not to say to a foster parent

2010-11-09T17:30:00.000-08:00

In the 9 short months I've been a foster parent, there has been one comment that I find to be so rude and insensitive I wanted to share with everyone so that no one will make the same mistake if you bump into a foster parent. It's been said to me over and over by strangers, friends and others who I guess can't think of anything else to say...what is it?

When referring to foster care, someone will say "Oh, I could never do that, it would just be too hard to have the child leave", or "Oh, I would love the kids too much to give them back, I could never."

Does anyone realize by saying that it's implying I'm heartless? I hold my tongue from saying "Well then it's a good thing I'm a heartless monster right?"

Some foster parent "friends" of mine have suggested the following responses (which hopefully I'll be able to pull from next time instead of standing there dumbfounded):

"You can handle a lot more than you think you can."

"You're right it is very hard, it takes special people to be able love fully and then let go, not everyone has a heart big enough for that."

"The kids deserve to be loved enough that someone is heartbroken if they leave."

"This "job" isn't for everyone."

Or maybe I'll make up one of my own like "yeah you do have to have a certain degree of selflessness to do foster care."

Another remark that sends chills down my spine is that "oh you're foster parents! That's wonderful!" I know kinda what they mean, but no, there is nothing wonderful about it. Children are going through such horrible situations they are removed from their parents. Kids are so confused about who to trust, what is right and have lost everything. I'm just doing my part. I breaks my heart there has to be a such thing as foster parents. Sometimes I cry for the suffering my girls have been through--because they can't do it for themselves. It's terrible, not wonderful.

One last thing I'd recommend NOT saying to a foster parent: "How much do you get "paid"? Grrrr!

Sigh...

2010-11-03T11:54:00.001-07:00

I take fully authorship of this post and all the opinions expressed therein. --Debbie

Perhaps I am becoming too cynical and skeptical, and for that I beg God to soften my heart. But sometimes it can feel like I'm alone in a world of strangers and actors. Friends who only want to be there for advice or to talk about the easy things in life have become the norm. It's what I've come to expect from most "friends".

I admit, my life is not grand or perfect, not exciting to hear about. And I also admit that I have pulled away from people because it's just too hard to get people to care, and it's hard to be around people who don't. There is a certain degree to which we've been supported, but I can't help sometimes but feel a crushing sort of sadness because of what we've lost. Through it all I know that God is so so sovereign and has a plan in all of this.

I doubt people want to read this sort of thing-I know I sure wouldn't. But here's the truth as I've experienced it:

There is a HUGE difference between parenting normal biological children with minimal issues, and parenting foster children who are bruised and scared so emotionally that they may never in fact live a normal life.

And very few people can understand this-even with immense explanation.
We deal with emotions, feeling and behaviors on a daily basis that most will never go through with their child.

Parenting biological children who are mostly normal (with a few quirks here and there) is easy. My kids are still small and we haven't reached those teenage years yet, but I can guarantee it'll be a lot easier than guiding kids through these years who have no idea what boundaries are or how to form appropriate attachments.

So when I hear someone complaining of a really "tough" day because their child had an potty accident, or acted out-excuse me if I lack empathy (I told you I'm growing more and more cynical). If only that could be the worst of it for so many children today. If only the worst thing I had to worry about was soiled pants.

(**There are plenty of parents who have biological kids with serious issues. I realize that. And for that my heart breaks because even with the right raising and proper care sometimes things can go wrong.)

Perhaps one of the hardest things about it all is the anger that creeps up for having to deal with problems I didn't have any part in creating. So many kids aren't even given a chance-they're doped up with drugs in utero, and then live in a chaotic existence from the moment of birth.If they had been mine to begin with it wouldn't be like this. I can barely stand to look at the mother. God give me your love! I am so wretched and pitiful.

But to so many this is all just "too bad". Maybe a quick word of prayer on our behalf will be said or a sense of pity. Maybe regret that they even read this.

I'm surprised though each day at the feeling of gratitude for this experience. I'm realizing more and more I'd rather have these girls in my life than the surface/fake friendships I spent time on before.

Sometimes I feel overwhelmed at the difference in my life. Things can never go back to how they were-praise the Lord!
And sometimes out of mercy and love God plants someone in my life who knows exactly what to say, or can relate in ways I hadn't even thought of, or a comment that confirms my calling--and it's people and moments like that which keep my head above the water in the sea of skepticism I sometimes slip into.

It is possible I'm too honest, that I've said too much. This is the life God has given me and I will use every moment I can to honor Him. He has put me here and walks with me through it all. I can hardly believe how real my communion with Him is now-man had I been missing out!

Room 814

2010-10-04T05:48:00.000-07:00

About 5 years ago I worked at Homewood Suites by Hilton. It was a very nice (expensive) one hundred twenty room hotel. Many people used it for extended stay because all of the rooms were suites, meaning there was a fully furnished kitchen in every unit, and a generous living space separate from the sleeping quarters. There were studio suites, one and two bedrooms suites available.

While I worked there (for a short 4 months) there was a woman living there because her house had burned down due to a fire and she was living there temporarily while her new home was being built.

There was also a whole construction crew of men that lived there for about a month while they built a new restaurant across from the hotel.

Of course there were the guests who just stayed for a week or two while on business.

None of these people planned on living there forever. It was a temporary home, and they knew they would be going to their real home soon.

No one decorated their suites or repainted or even added to what was already there.
Not one guest while I worked there ever spent money on making their room nicer, prettier, cozier, or better in some way.

Why would they? Why would someone spend money on something so temporary?

Brothers and sisters, why are we spending so much money on our temporary houses? Our home is not here on earth-this is just a temporary place to stay while we are waiting to go home.

Matthew 6:19 is a familiar verse, “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and there thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven where neither moth nor rust destroy and where thieves do not break in and steal.”

If I were to translate the Bible into an non-literal easy read version, this verse would read like this “Stop buying and buying things for yourselves. These things are meaningless, you can not take anything with you. They will lay in ruin. These things can be stolen right from you! Rather spend on the things that matter. Give all that you can without hesitation or reservation. For the gifts given to Heaven can not be stolen or rust. These are the things that matter.”

Another popular verse is Psalm 23:1 “The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.”
I think there is some confusion about this verse. It does not mean “I shall not have wants because I buy everything I can possibly think of “needing” or wanting”. This verse is not giving the go head to make a list as long as the Nile about all the things you can dream up of wanting.

This beautiful verse is supposed to be an example of the intimacy David had with God. A sheep wants for nothing, they are clothes by their thick wool, they are fed without needing to ask and they are protected by His rod and staff. They don’t need to go out to the mall and find a new coat, they don’t wander the grocery isle wondering what they want to eat. They don’t install expensive security systems for protection.

Materialism in America is a disgusting pollution, and unfortunately it’s plaguing the church as well.
So called “Christians” are believing the wolf from Little Red Robin Hood. He says “You NEED a big HD TV”-why? “All the better to SEE the TV shows you want to watch!”

He says “You need a nice surround sound system” Why? “All the better to HEAR that big TV you own!”

He says “You need to buy more clothes and more food and more stuff!” Why? “All the better to LOOK and feel!”
The woof is Satan and he is looking to devour in every way he can. Images dance in front of our eyes and before we know it, we’re putting a down payment on an upgrade to our car, or house or cabinets, or TV or memberships. We’re shopping for granite, or silk or a 4 star hotel.

A life like this is easy to spot. Lives like this point to the heart-Matthew 6 continues in verse 21 “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
My translation “where you spend your time and money, there your heart will live as well. If your sacrificially giving to the Lord and His will instead of your own selfishness, your heart will be with Him.”

Many people think they can live such a life but still claim their hearts belong to God. These verses argue just the opposite.
Treasures on earth tie you down. You want to stay with them, you want to enjoy the expensive trip planned or live in the beautiful house you’ve bought, or even watch your children grow up (yes, treasures can be non-material!). Treasures keep you from being heavenly minded, from focusing on the kingdom of God.

John MacArthur makes a great point “When the heart is right the treasure is poured toward God. In terms of spiritual life you must always deal with your heart attitude, because it is out of the heart that man operates. "For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he" (Prov. 23:7a). So, we preach to the heart. When the heart is right the treasure is sent toward God. Our heart has an inseparable attachment to wherever our treasure is. Conversely, wherever our heart is, that is where we put our treasure.”

There is a song by Francesca Battistelli and the lyrics of the chorus go like this:
It’s your life
What you gonna do?
The world is watching you
Every day the choices you make
Say what you are and who
Your heart beats for
It’s an open door
It’s your life

Yes, every day the choices (and purchases because even though are choices) made, point to where your heart is. Giving to orphans, the needy, the giving of the Word point to a life dedicated to God- spending on self shows a selfish life.

I can’t help but notice how the way lives are lived contradict the message we want to spread.
Some might find it necessary to have a Bible cover-I mean how else could one carry the precious Word of God around other than in suede. It seems silly when put it in a global context and the fact that Christians in North Korea, China and around the world do not own the Bible and would be put to death if one was found in their possession.

We convince ourselves that we are living in NEED. We need this and we need that, when really here in America there is virtually nothing we are in true need of. Our houses are stuffed full of stuff that honestly have absolutely no value in heaven, and therefore are meaningless. Even worse, we convince ourselves that we deserve this kind of life-too bad for the poor overseas or a mile down the road, out of sight out of mind.

I hear people singing “this world has nothing for me and this world has everything” and other songs with lyrics pointing to how worthless the “stuff” on earth is, and I can’t help but think “ Man are they trying everything out! They want to make absolute certain that this life has nothing for them before they write it all off as meaningless."

This is the way the Lord has changed my mindset: Instead of buying yet another pair of shoes, why not donate to the International Bible Society-where they will then smuggle the Word of God into communist countries via air balloon or other secret method.

Instead of buying a case of soda, why not donate to www.thewaterproject.org – they bring clean drinkable water to villages that do not have access to safe, clean drinking water. In fact their website makes the startling statement that nearly 1 BILLION people are suffering because they do not have water to drink.

These are things that would lay up treasures in HEAVEN, verses on earth.

I have recently been so convicted of my spending-even though I would consider myself careful and mindful. I have been shopping for my kid’s clothes, and my own at Impact Thrift, Liberty Ministries and Little Liberty. I can find all kinds of nice stuff there at unbelievable prices.
But the more important reason is this: I can easily go to Target or Sears and find stuff on clearance and on sale but ultimately all that does is support the CEO’s multi-million dollar salary.

Shopping at Impact Thrift benefits others because they support ministries such as Bethany Christian services, Bethanna, Cradle of Hope, and Manna on Main street-just to name a few.
Impact gives back to organizations who purposefully help others.

Same as Liberty-they have a prison ministry designed to help the spiritual needs of the incarcerated.

My point is this-stop the spending. Stop the “needing”. Stop the wanting.
Make wise decisions and let the unnecessary things go un-purchased.

Live as though this earth is your temporary residence-because if you are truly a believer, it is! Your home is in Heaven, in His glory.

Some will disagree with me because they want to hang on to selfishness and will adamantly say there is nothing wrong with possessions when it isn’t an “idol”. That there is nothing wrong with saving and spending because they give too (just 10% though!). Scripture says otherwise though. I don’t mind being disagreed with because ultimately an account will be given to God about the where they laid their treasures.

Posting this is a big leap for me. Not only will I be even further ostracized but I will be scrutinized. I am putting myself on the line because my life will be examined to see if I live what I “preach”. And all the more reason for me to post it! Knowing I will be held accountable by those wanting to find fault in me is actually encouraging. The Spirit will guide my life and my heart.

I have and do struggle with selfishness and covetousness. I struggle with wanting a bigger house in a nicer area, but I am learning to be content where I am, and finding the truest joy imaginable by giving to others.

It's been amazing to see my heart changed because of my spending habits. Sometimes it hard for me to even think 5 years down the road because I am so hopeful the Lord will come sooner than that. The Spirit has changed my heart and my mind, so much pales not in comparison with furthering His kingdom.

Change your mindset-view your home as your hotel room on earth while waiting for Heaven!

The Whole Truth and nothing but

2010-09-10T12:46:00.000-07:00

“When I was 4 I asked Jesus into my heart.” Well that’s the story I had anyways about how I “got saved”. I based my salvation on a prayer and I’m not convinced that it would have gotten me into heaven.

Since then my life has been changed-my heart has been replaced from a heart of stone to a heart of love through Christ. But too many people would smile and think I was “saved” because of my prayer.

Lately I’ve been convicted and concerned over the way so many parents, myself as well, “witness” to children. We sing Jesus Loves Me, we tell about Jonah and the Great Fish and teach them little prayers to say before meals.

In a way it all becomes second nature to them, without really knowing what it all means.
I don’t want my children to grow up saying “Jesus is in my heart” as if a little man were walking around in their chest.
Rather, I want them to say “Jesus paid my debt so that I can live, and live for him!” I want them to understand that Christ is the absolute only way to get to the Father and that a life with Him is a changed life. It’s a life of service, a life of witness and a life of love-all through Christ.

About a week ago something I read stopped me dead in my tracks. I realized it’s too easy to give a simple answer to children because we don’t think they can comprehend the real truth or gospel. But to teach otherwise is to teach the gospel with a “hole” in it.

After the Spirit showed me clearly the error I was making in just teaching the “nice” stuff—I had a talk with my 2 year old, Shayla. I told her Jesus loves Shayla and that is why he died. We can’t go to heaven without Him. We need Him. We need Him.

It’s become my mantra. “We need Jesus, We need Jesus!” I told Shayla that she needs to know this—it’s not enough to know Jesus love her…it’s what she does with that knowledge. Will He save her from her sins by her accepting His love and giving her life to Him?

The truth is, yes God does love us and sent his Son-Jesus, who also loves us. BUT until we accept Jesus as Lord and our only way to salvation, we are His enemies.

Romans 5:1-2 says “Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand.”

What is the opposite of peace? War-so before being justified through faith we were at war with Him, we were His enemies. We can have a new relationship of peace with Him through Christ.

But does knowing or saying Jesus loves me put you into this relationship? No, Jesus loving us was the first part-the fact that he died, became sin and rose victorious against sin is the beautiful gospel in a nutshell.

The second part-the part which makes us children of God is accepting this truth. Accepting that we’re sinners, and that without Christ we are enemies of God-worthless and unable to do any good at all.
Jesus didn’t die in vain-He died so that we might be saved.

Too often we only present the first part to children, we don’t tell them what a life with Christ is like or rather what a life without Him is like.

And to do so is bringing up religious children, not necessarily one who are saved by the grace of God. They know the stories, they know the right answers but Jesus is not Lord of their life, because they don’t know He should be. I’m determined to teach my children the whole Gospel-the good, the bad (sinners, hell, Satan) and the saving Grace of Him.

I want my children to know His voice, to be His sheep-to seek to do His will.
Deuteronomy 11 is about reminding the Israelites of the laws and commands and what God brought them out from. In verse 1 they are taught “Love the Lord your God and keep his requirements, his decrees and his commands always”, and verse 13 reiterates it, “So if you faithfully obey the commands I am giving you today—to love the Lord your God and to serve him with all your heart and with all your soul…” (then he tells of the blessings they will have).

Then in verse 19 Moses tells them about teaching the law to their children “Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Write them on the door frames of your houses and on your gates, so that your days and the days of your children may be many in the land that the LORD swore to give your forefathers, as many as the days that the heavens are above the earth.”

Basically-they should be speaking all day about God and sharing with the children about Him in everything they do through out their life. Make reminders for yourself of Him-keep Him and His law on your mind.

“Christ called me and changed my heart-I believe in Him alone for my salvation and I live for Him alone. God has given me the Spirit to direct me in doing His Will. This earth is not my home and one day I will be with Him at home in Heaven.”---that is now my testimony, and the one I want my children to have.

New verse for “Jesus Loves Me”- not perfect-but give it a try (singing it to the tune)
“We need Jesus as our Lord to have peace with God up high, Without Jesus I am lost but because of Him I live”

"Look, Lord, See my shells."

2010-08-31T12:16:00.000-07:00

“I will tell you what a tragedy is. I will show you how to waste your life. Consider a story from the February 1998 edition of Reader’s Digest, which tells about a couple who “took early retirement from their jobs in the Northeast five years ago when he was 59 and she was 51. Now they live in Punta Gorda, Florida, where they cruise on their 30 foot trawler, play softball and collect shells.”

At first, when I read it I thought it might be a joke. A spoof on the American Dream. But it wasn’t. Tragically, this was the dream: Come to the end of your life—your one and only precious, God-given life—and let the last great work of your life, before you give an account to your Creator, be this: playing softball and collecting shells.

Picture them before Christ at the great day of judgment: 'Look, Lord, See my shells.’ That is a tragedy. And people today are spending billions of dollars to persuade you to embrace that tragic dream. Over against that, I put my protest: Don’t buy it. Don’t waste your life.”

–John Piper, Don’t Waste Your Life

I just heard this as I am currently listening to John Piper's book on audio. I was saddened by how true this is. I wasted years of my life making video games and sports my idols just as these people found their idols in the pleasures of this world. Why live for hay and stubble when there is a treasure hidden in the field?

-John

2010-08-17T11:47:00.000-07:00

Wait one minute

2010-07-27T12:18:00.000-07:00

I'm outraged, flabbergasted and embarrassed for the state of Christianity. My husband recently came home and showed me a picture he had taken in the religion section of a book store.
It was of a NIV Study Bible for busy moms and the selling point of it was "Daily Inspiration, even if you only have one minute."

http://www.christianbook.com/niv-bible-moms-italian-tone-pink/9780310949732/pd/949730?item_code=WW&netp_id=758542&event=ESRCN&view=details#curr

Ok-stop right there. One minute? Come on! Women, mothers, people-stop making excuses. Set the alarm, and get up early. Turn off the TV. Leave the dishes till tomorrow. God did not bless me with children to use as a cop-out to ignore Him.

This Bible has fifty-two thought starters for each day, that will take approximately one minute. Then there are two other sections to dive into that will take either five or ten minutes.
On the back cover of the Bible in question is a testimonial from "Joy" who says "It felt like the easiest thing I did all day." She claims that once her little one came along, gone was the time, and she's now grateful for this Bible.

A couple thoughts on this:
To study something doesn't mean a quick glance. It means to learn, to contemplate and to meditate on.

I remember in college setting aside time to study and prepare for an exam which was fast approaching. I'd turn down offers to hang out with friends, tell my then boyfriend (now husband) that we'd have to talk later, and even close up the Snood game I was playing, all in preparation for studying.

Then when the time I set aside had come, I'd find somewhere quiet, and read, review, make flash cards, write notes, and test myself over and over again until I knew the material.

When I prepared to take a test I studied hard and long until I felt confident I knew the material well enough to be tested in it.

What if, when I was looking to pass a class in biology, I attended class one minute a day. The chances of me passing that class and having any clue about the subject would not be very high.

How then can one claim to know God but literally spend only one minute per day with Him?

Some may look at my life and consider me a "busy mom". I have 3 children, 2 foster daughters, I run and manage an established pet sitting company and work 20 hours+/week. I clean, I cook, I do the grocery shopping and all the other things that go with being a mom and wife.

I also find it important to nurture my friendships and relationships. I enjoy reading (although getting through the 4th Harry Potters is slow going) and most importantly I am a servant to the King.

But when I think of my own life, nothing seems more important that my relationship with Christ. I don't consider myself extremely busy, and definitely not so much so that I barely have one minute to spare for the maker of the universe. I truly do not feel overwhelmed by my life and what He has entrusted to me-but that is probably because the work is for Him and His burden is light-but that's for another post.

I'm not trying to be facetious here but what in the world is more important that a relationship with God? Sports (and dare I say, a world series)? Video games? Shopping?

When I sit down to spend time with God I do it armed with my Bible, my Matthew Henry Commentary and I read and re-read a passage until it sinks in. I real all study notes and do all cross referencing. I study it until I understand what it means and all that I can take from it. I look into the context and examine what the writer was going through when it was written.
Simply leafing through a chapter until I come across a familiar verse to read just doesn't seem to be enough.

I'm actually annoyed about this Bible enough to write to Zondervan and convey my disgust. To dismiss the Bible and the content it holds with such a flippant catch phrase as "Got a minute? Only a Minute? This Bible is designed for you" is an absolute shame.

We must encourage one another to study the Bible and give it the time and respect it deserves. It is the Living Word of God-and this marketing seems like a pathetic attempt to give people a false sense of familiarity with Him. It takes much more than one minute to know Him.
Luke 10:1-18 show a beautiful picture of Jesus as the shepherd of His flock. He says (vs.14), "I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me-just as the Father knows me and I know the father-and I lay down my life for the sheep."

What a privilege to know Him and be known by him. Of course it seems obvious that He would know me, but that I can know Him, well that is a special thing. But how can I know him? How can I know his voice as He says in verse 4? "When he has brought out all his own, he goes on ahead of them, and his sheep follow him because they know His voice." Just reading that tightens my throat because it's a precious thing.

Any mother knows the cry of her child. I remember when my first child, Russell, was born. The nurse had taken him to the nursery for a new born check up and a few minutes later I heard a cry in the hall and I knew it was him. He was only a day old-but yet I knew that cry. I knew his voice.

Even now, in a large group, I can tell if my child is the one crying. But would I knowhis voice if I only spent one minute a day with my kids?
How do we expect to know the voice of our shepherd if we spend so little time with Him?

Many claim to know the Lord and to be seeking His will for their life-but they'll let days slip by without cracking the binding of their Bible, or even thinking twice about talking with Him.

Having a relationship with Christ is by far the sweetest thing. I've learned to know Him by studying the Bible and by talking with Him. And like cultivating any relationship, it's taken time. But it's been worth every minute. It's been worth every "sacrifice"; and every missed nap, TV show and phone call.

It's like nails down a chalk board when I hear someone say "I just don't have time to read my Bible", but the next breath talk about the finale of Lost or 24 or whatever popular show has captured the general public.

I urge you, spend every spare minute with him. Make the time by shutting the TV off, closing the computer, logging off FaceBook, turning the cell phone on "quiet" and removing every other distraction that would hinder you from knowing Him.

One minute is a good place to start but it probably won't get you very far, and definitely not enough to pass the test. Know Him well.

God Saves! But does the Sinner's Prayer Only Hurt People?

2010-05-07T06:49:00.000-07:00

The video below was shared on Facebook today by 'I'llbeHonest'. Every comment that was made there and also the corresponding comments on YouTube were in agreement with the video. This brings many questions to my mind.

How often are people truly saved after praying the sinner's prayer?

Does the sinner's prayer give people a false sense of security?

Is the sinner's prayer a gospel based on a work of man?

Should churches and preachers still use the sinner's prayer?

At this point these questions are just that. I don't know how I feel about the sinner's prayer. I prayed the prayer when I was about eight years old, then I continued to live like Jesus was not even a part of my life for years. I doubt the time that I prayed that prayer was actually when God saved me.

-John

You have HOW many kids??

2010-04-28T12:21:00.000-07:00

You have HOW many kids??

People are always somewhat amazed at the number our family currently consists of.
Last week I answered a phone call and got a cheery voice on the other end informing me she was from the 4 seasons hotel in Virginia somewhere.
So I say “ok….”. She begins her speech about how I “won” a 3 day 2 night stay at the resort for my family of 4. Well that’s where the problem started.
I say “well I have a family of 7”. There is a rather long pause, probably her calculating what that means, then she says “Oh! You have FIVE children??” All of this is still said in her high pitch cheery voice. I say “Yes.”.
Just to make sure I’m sure, she says “Well, well you don’t sound old enough to have 5 children!”
Hmmm—ok. So I tell her “well that’s the truth”. Sometimes it’s just too complicated to get into all the specifics.
So from there we have a rather long dialog about how we could indeed take advantage of this “prize”. Here’s a little of how it went:
Her: well I could have 5 stay if all 3 attending children are under 18.
Me: They’re all under 18, but again, we have 5.
Her: Well, could you leave 2 at home with someone? (Don’t I wish!)
Me: Hmm, I don’t think that will work.
Her: Maybe the 2 youngest?
Me: No, that won’t work either. The youngest is 5 month old and I nurse him.
Her: Well maybe you and your husband could just get away. (again, how nice that would be!)
Me: I don’t think that will work. Maybe you can pick another person to win?
Her: No, I can’t do that. Well this prize is good for one year. Do you think it will work then?
Me: Probably not.
Her: Well what do you do when you go away?
Me: We get 2 rooms.
Her: well you could just pay for the 2nd room! (as if that was the best idea she had yet!)
Me: I don’t think this will work but thank you so much anyways!
Oh well. I’m sure we’ll “win” again someday!

Foster Care

2009-09-23T18:31:00.000-07:00

Back in February John and I were convicted heavily by the Holy Spirit. We began contemplating the life we were living. There was nothing noticeably wrong about it but we weren’t doing what Jesus commanded---which is to take up our cross daily to follow Him. Although we both led “good Christian lives” something was missing. We fellowshipped each Sunday, participated some service ministries and overall did the “right” things.

Several things happened to us once we started praying that the Lord will use us to His glory. There is something different about truly wanting and allowing yourself to be used by Him.

One area impressed upon us was the idea of helping others. This is commanded to us several times throughout the Bible. As the great commission tells us--Go into all the nation. I’ve been noticing how important every single word in the Bible is. We are told to GO! We are not to sit and wait for others to come, we are to seek out every opportunity to follow in Christ’s footsteps.

At some point John and I felt we were being led to become foster care parents. We initially started by just looking into different agencies, but the very first day I requested information, actually within the hour, I was contacted by a social worker.

Early March we went to an information meeting with a Christian foster care agency. Right about this time I found out I was pregnant with our 3^rd baby. Of course this made us stop and think about whether we should move forward with the training needed to become approved.

After much prayer we both felt that we were still to pursue this leading. Through the past 6 months, whenever we came to a closed door, we saw it swing open and were gently lead straight through with Christ’s hands on our shoulders, assuring us this is what we were to be doing.

Bethanna requires about 25 hours of PRIDE training. PRIDE stands for Parent’s Resource for Information Development Education. These classes went over many aspects of being foster parents and through these we feel we are well trained.

Originally we were to be approved in August but that date got pushed back because our social worker would be away. So last week we got final approval. John and I joke that our social worker likes us more than we like ourselves! He believes that we can do this, and do it well.

On Tuesday September 22 we received a phone call about a placement. I have been praying diligently that if we are to have a placement before the baby comes (November 18^th) that it would happen before October.

We will be inviting 2 boys into our home for an indefinite period of time. Many hours of prayer went into this decision and although this will change many things, we still feel the Lord leading us.

Sometimes we are asked to do small things such as help someone in the church, send a note of encouragement, or even attend weekly fellowship. Sometimes we’re asked to do much more difficult things. Just because it will be difficult and a very big change, doesn’t mean it’s impossible or the wrong choice.

At some points through this process I have thought, “well maybe this will be kinda like Abraham and Isaac”. The Lord took him all the way up the mountain, placed Isaac on the bed of rocks and raised the knife. Then, after the Lord saw that Abraham had done all that he asked, he stopped him and provided a lamb.” I thought to myself, “maybe this is a test to see if we’ll obey. Maybe at the last minute something will fall through and we’ll be let off the hook.” But at the same time, I prayed that if we could be used to help a child then I wanted to be used. It’s absolutely amazing to truly come to a place where a desire to be used by God in any way is there. To feel the Spirit’s leading is awesome and a much better way of living from just going along with the day to day.

First though I had to pray for the desire to be used, then I prayed to be used, and now I’m praying fervently that God will stay close by our side as we enter into this new life.

The stress and inconvenience adding a child in to our lives will amount to, is nothing compared to what these children have been through. Many have been seriously abused, neglected and overall abandoned. They have been ripped from their home, their community, their schools and family.

Many have commented “it will be so tough if they leave”. Of course we will miss the presence of a child whom we have opened our home to. But if they are leaving us it is for permanence. They will either be going home, getting adopted or going to another loving family. It’s all about perspective and we aren’t in this to “keep kids” or adopt every child. We are hoping to be used as a safe and caring place for children till they are placed in a permanent place.

We are certain that this was given to us by the Lord and it is how He desires to use us. There are so many uncertainties that go along with this, but we rest assured that God is by our side.

In discussing whether or not to accept this placement John said “can we handle this?” I said “NO!” But then went on to say that WE can’t but GOD CAN! And it’s so peaceful knowing that he will not leave us or set us up to fail.

We appreciate any prayers offered on our behalf for wisdom, endurance and guidance.

"World Champions"?

2009-07-22T12:36:00.000-07:00

So the Phillies were last years "World Champions"? I think not. This is yet another example of how American thinks they rule the world.

Don't get me wrong, it's all good they won the "World Series". I personally couldn't care less, it did not change my life in even the smallest way. I'm happy for Shane Victorino though because he's my boy--you know?

Here's my argument; the Major League Baseball teams are made up of cities in America. Sure sure they may have players from different countries but they are American teams. In the Olympics, countries are playing for themselves. In baseball, people play for a team. In the World Series case, these are all American teams.

SO I think it is utterly ridiculous to claim a World Champion status. If they had actually played against other WORLD countries, sure, but really the Phillies are just American champions.

It's not a WORLD Series if only one place is involved!
So I'll admit the Phillies are good, maybe even great, I really don't follow, but are they World Champions? Not in my understanding of geography!

So I shouldn't pay my mortgage with credit cards?

2009-07-08T20:31:00.000-07:00

This will be short. I just thought it was awesome today when Obama was asked about another potential stimulus he responded by saying that spending more borrowed money is “potentially counterproductive.”

Ya think? So running up crazy amounts of debt is only "potentially counterproductive". BTW...Obama is not really telling the whole truth in that statement. China is no longer running to buy up our debt. So we are spending a whole lot of printed money on top of whatever we can still borrow.

6D3JTYSUDWHU

Why do Christians support Torture?

2009-05-25T19:27:00.000-07:00

A new study(results below) done by the pew research center shows that torture is more widely accepted amongst white evangelical protestant Christians than the general population or any other Christian group. The study shows that it is even more likely a christian that attends church regularly will support torture over one that seldom or never attends church services.

Merriam-Webster defines torture as "the infliction of intense pain (as from burning, crushing, or wounding) to punish, coerce, or afford sadistic pleasure".

79 percent of White evangelical protestants think this can be justified. I would fall into the small 5% group that believes it can't be justified.

There are so many verses that would condemn the act of torture on an individual level. Many Christians haze this by stating that the torture is done by the government. Although our government is a republic of "We The People", so don't the decisions of our government come back into the level of the individual, if not, why?

I'd be interested in hearing any answers a christian that supports torture would give to the following. We(the U.S.A) have signed a treaty stating that we won't torture. As a Christian can you support dishonesty? Since our Government signed a treaty stating they wouldn't torture, do you think God would support them torturing someone? If yes, please explain in the comments. If no, than how can you support it?

-John

Homeless

2009-03-13T12:32:00.000-07:00

What happens when you see a homeless person sitting with a propped up cardboard sign holding a cup with a dirty hand? Do you look away? Make eye contact? Walk a bit quicker?

That's what I've regrettably done before. For some reason there seems to be this stigma attached to homeless people. They got themselves in that situation because of their addictions or some other bad choice. Or they must be dangerous or deranged. Why don't they just go to a shelter? They obviously don't want to better themselves.

But you know what? To stop and talk with these people is eye opening. It's heart breaking and an experience that won't soon be forgotten. Hardly a day goes by where I don't think and pray for Tara-the homeless women we met on Valentines Day.

Their reality is this: in most cases there is no "getting out". The shelter system is very flawed and just plain degrading. When you've lost everything, having to give up a last shred of dignity by showering with others is just plain impossible. Those that do choose to find rest in a shelter have very limited privacy and are often robbed of their belongings. This is such an outrage to me--how much trouble would it be to get those little foot lockers they have at Hershey Park? Give them a sense of security so that they can rest without keeping one eye open.

Last Saturday I met Iesha (I'm not sure how to spell it so I wrote it the way it sounds). She was a young women of 21 years old. She literally had no where to go.

Growing up in the Dominican Republic wasn't too bad for her, unless you count being left at the hospital by her mother when she was born, or being raped by her step-brother (went through the courts in the DR but he only got 10 days) When she came here things got even worse. Her mom's is a drug addict and when she was out of money-she'd use Iesha as payment. The mom's boyfriend was abusive and her mom blamed the bruises on Iesha.

I asked if she had anywhere she could go, she has a cousin but "really weird stuff" goes on there...must be bad if she chooses the streets over that house. Her aunt recently died which is what lead up to her being on the streets. When her mom kicked her out-she literally left with what she had. To this day-she does not have undergarments on.

It's been a month now for Iesha. She's been kicked out of one shelter because "she made herself homeless" (i.e. she "could" stay with her cousin).

I asked her how I could help, she said "I need to know what to do. I don't know where to go or what to do." I believe she does know Jesus. I told her the best I can give her is a reminder of Christ's love. She said at night she cries out to him.

Remember 2 weeks ago when we got about 6 inches of snow? Well she was out in that. There is a homeless cafe she goes to (there are no beds, but it's a warm place open from 9:30 p.m.-6:30 a.m.) but they only take the first 75 people. She didn't make it in time.

Many days have passed since I met her-but I've thought about her and have wanted to drive and find her and open my home to her. She does not deserve that life. None of them do. It is absolutely despicable that in a city of "brotherly love" and a place of such wealth we have people literally living ON THE STREETS.

In the past I've taken the stance "yes we (Christians) are to help the poor but I'm sure someone else will". No! Deuteronomy 15:7-8,11 "If there is a poor man among you brothers in any of the towns of the land that the Lord your God is giving you, do not be hardhearted or tightfisted toward your poor brother.. Rather be openhanded and freely lend him whatever he needs." (11) "There will always be poor people in the land. Therefore I command you to be openhanded toward your brothers and toward the poor and needy in your land."

And since it's a bit long Matthew 25:31-46 basically says (but look it up for yourself!) that Jesus will say that those who clothed him and looked after him when he was in need will be bless--and when was he naked and in need? Well He answers "I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me." Likewise, those who did not feed him when he was hungry or gave him nothing when he was thirsty are cursed. And when was he hungry and thirsty? He again answers, "I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me."

And believe me, these people are hungry and thirsty. They are in need of clothes (another women we met had no shoes. None. I'm still kicking myself that I didn't give her mine).

I urge you, next time you see someone who looks in need...give them what you can! And just a thought---a dollar can't buy much anymore! And many of them do not want money, they want a meal.

Pray for these people, they need a solution, they need a listening ear, they need a hug. Pray that there will be change in the shelter system and that more people will show Christ's love to them by offering a cup of soup or piece of bread. Sometimes it seems impossible because there are so many of them with so many needs. But meeting just one of those needs can give them the hope to keep pressing on and to not lose faith.

Should Christians view and support movies that depict sexual acts and immorality?

2009-03-08T10:07:00.000-07:00

Should Christians view and support movies that depict sexual acts and immorality?

Funny, after typing out that title, it doesn't seem to me like an entire post about this is necessary but I digress. I am writing this out as a response to some of the responses on Deb's facebook note.

Here is Deb's note in its entirety.

"Oh be careful little eyes what you see, oh be careful little eyes what you see, for the Father up above is looking down in love, so be careful little eyes what you see..

I heard a review on a movie today by Klove--it lead me to look at a site that reviews the content of movies...
Check out this popular on for yourself---http://www.kids-in-mind.com/w/watchmen.htm"

First, let me clear up that Deb's post was in reference to one particular movie, The Watchmen, and not 'R' rated movies in general.

This movie contains, full nudity, sex, attempted rape, prostitution and other pornographic images. The fact that this movie contains sexual immorality is clear.

Some scripture and questions to consider. (New Living Translation)

1 Corinthians 6:18a
18 Run from sexual sin!

As a christian would seeing this movie being running from sexual sin? Of course not.

Matthew 5:27-29
27 “You have heard the commandment that says, ‘You must not commit adultery.’[a] 28 But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. 29 So if your eye—even your good eye[b]—causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.

What man could could honestly say that seeing naked women and sex doesn't foster lustful thoughts and temptation?

Ephesians 5:1-3
1 Imitate God, therefore, in everything you do, because you are his dear children. 2 Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ. He loved us[a] and offered himself as a sacrifice for us, a pleasing aroma to God. 3 Let there be no sexual immorality, impurity, or greed among you. Such sins have no place among God’s people.

These verses flat out say that sexual immorality is a sin and has "no place among God’s people". It also references "following the example of Christ" making any thought about Jesus actually seeing this movie wrong.

Philippians 4:8
8 And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure,and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.

Feel free to read the list of things that are in this movie again. Do you really think seeing this movie would help a Christian to fix his/her thoughts on "what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable".

The reason I am posting this isn't to judge anyone for seeing any movie, not at all. I sin, ALL THE TIME!. I could never judge someone for their sins. Pointing out that something is sin and judging people for their sins are very different things. I believe the bible is clear in that watching movies like The Watchmen is sin. There are many many more bible references but I think I posted enough.

Deb then went on to mention that it was sad that Christians would go see this movie. I agree with Deb 100% and I believe the bible is pretty clear on this. This is not a matter of judging anyone. I am not saying that Christians are any worse of a person or less of a Christian because they went to see the Watchman, nor was Deb. God is sad about sin why shouldn't Christians be?

-John

It may be long-but it's true

2009-02-25T11:36:00.000-08:00

I’ve been guilty of all the below. But On Saturday I had an awakening. I have finally seen the simple truth of being in Christ.

John and I were walking back to our car after Valentine’s day dinner downtown on Saturday. We passed a homeless man and a conversation about the homeless population started between us. We then passed a women who obviously had nowhere to go. Her head was hung down and behind the little cup in front of her she held a sign.
I felt something catch in my throat and I asked John to walk back to her with me. I dropped down to my knees and said “how can we help you?” She said that she had so many needs but that she would like some hot chocolate. John got up to go to the Dunkin Donuts. I asked her about her life. She explained how she worked at a daycare in FL and helped at a youth group. She got her name on a list for low income housing in Philadelphia and when she got the call that she was up, she moved up here. Her father died and somehow she got bumped from the list.

She told me she slept in a tent under 95 and that she was sad because “today is Valentine’s Day”. Just about then John came back with a large hot chocolate, some muffins and bagels and a gift card to Dunkin Donuts. I gave her my business card and pointed out my phone number telling her to please call me I can ever help her.
I asked where she’d be sleeping that night and she said the tent—I asked if she’d want to stay in a hotel. She said yeah but that they were all too expensive around there. I asked how else I could help and she looked at me and asked “do you have a pad or tampon?” Tears fell from my eyes as I look through my purse and realized I didn’t’. She said it was ok and that she could get stuff from the hospital. By this point my face is covered in tears. Such a basic need and she was without. After a few hours of phone calls and driving around we found a shelter where she could go.
Had we not, I told John that I would have offered to bring her home. Of course the initial reaction is fear-maybe she uses drugs or would try to harm us. OR maybe she doesn’t and maybe she wouldn’t. Why should we hesitate to do that which Christ would? He associated with people who were looked down on. Rahab was protected for doing what God wanted her to do, why should we think we’d be offered any less? And if we show Christ’s love-which is perfect then we should have no fear -1 John 4:18 “There is no fear in Love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love”.

This experience really opened my eyes. To be in Christ isn’t about bettering our lives. It isn’t about making a family or a home. It isn’t about getting a degree or moving up in rank at our jobs. It’s about showing God’s love. We are here to spread the message of salvation. We are not here to grow our “churches” in terms of building and programs. We don’t need choirs, we don’t need new carpets or a fresh coat of paint. I do think we need functional programs and services to bring the unsaved in but so much of the contemporary church is frivolous. The thought so often is to give money and let others care for those in need. But we are called to action.
We all have so much. Way more than we need. “1 John 3: 17”-If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him how can the love of God be in Him?” Exactly! And what if they don’t “see” a brother in need? Well frankly-they aren’t looking!

Since Saturday I’ve have felt the most amazing presence of God. I’ve never felt this before-I feel like I could just shout! The pure Love I felt for Tara must be from God-kinda like His love for us. In me is a new passion a new understanding, a new desire.

The truth that I came to see is this: God put us here for one reason. To show His love to others. I can no longer stay silent. I must tell others of this love.
SO many Christians are like the seed from Mark 4:18 “18 The seed that fell among the thorns represents others who hear God’s word, 19 but all too quickly the message is crowded out by the worries of this life, the lure of wealth, and the desire for other things, so no fruit is produced.”

I was one of them. I have a lot of things to change but now I can see clearly what I’m here for. I’ve been saved since I was a child-and acknowledged my need for Him and accepted His gift. But what have I been doing since? I’ve helped in various church programs-but what about those who do come out to those things? We must meet them where they are. And they are on the streets, in the alleys, under the highways. They are next door to us, they are down the street, they are standing beside us. Every single thing we do must point to Christ.

Listen to Mark 7:6-8 “He replied “Isaiah was right when he prophesied about you hypocrites, as it is written “these people honor me with their lips but their hearts are far from me. They worship me in vain, their teachings are but rules taught by men. You have let go of the commands of God and are holding on to the traditions of men”. Exactly! Our traditions are “go get an education, get a respectable job, work hard, make money (Yes! Even in the Christian circle this is the theme-even if it’s not admitted!), have a family and encourage them on all the same.” But WHAT does God command of us? It’s all there, plain as day-we just don’t see it.

When we die-Christ will not care about the sq. footage of our house or what degree we had or how much money we made. I think many will stand in front of Jesus in all his Glory and regret they had not done more for him. I do not want to feel that way!
Here’s the thing though, say you wanted someone to write a book about you. You’d want them to know every detail and you’d want to make sure they knew the facts so that they got them right. You’d want them to know you, really know you.

Well that’s how God feels about us. He wants us to know him and to tell others about him with the facts. BUT how can we get to know him without the Bible? We devote so little to learning more about Him.

We give Him less than we give our employers. When’s the last time you called out of work because “you just couldn’t get up?” or “you slept in?”. Or when have you gone into work and spent the majority of the morning dozing off? Probably not recently if you want to keep your job. But how many do this on Sunday morning? Christians aren’t even setting aside 2-3 hours a week to spend time learning about Him. So if they don’t know Him how can they be expected to tell others about Him?

I have felt disappointed by the lack of leadership I see in some Christian husbands and families. Set an example by making Sunday a day for learning and worship! Not sleeping. I spent many Sunday mornings in bed instead of in church. It is shameful and a poor example. Sundays should be looked forward to and anticipated. Every effort should be made to attend church rested, fed and ready worship God and learn more about how to serve him.

Often we hear Christians requesting health, happiness, possessions or blessings from God. We almost expect that He will give us everything our heart desires-but what do we give him in return? A quick 5 minute prayer and skim through a chapter of His Word? We go through our days and weeks without giving much thought of what we should be doing for God. We know what we have to do at work, home and in church services, but our number one purpose is to be a servant of Christ by showing His love and worshiping.

Opening the Bible has a totally new meaning to me. I have never felt this before. I feel that God is pouring out His love on me-and He always was but I didn’t know it fully.

Matthew 13:13 sums up what I was “Though seeing they do not see, though hearing they do not hear or understand. In them is fulfilled the prophecy of Isaiah: You will be ever hearing but never understanding, you will be ever seeing but never perceiving. For this people’s heart has become calloused: they hardly hear with their ears, and they have closed their eyes. Otherwise they might see with their eyes, hear with their ears, understand with their hearts and I would heal them”.

I have sat in church and heard and understood the message being preached. And it may have changed me for a day or so. But I have a new understanding now.

Our purpose priority should be to learn all we can about Christ so that we can share it with everyone. I think our vision becomes blurred whenever something is coming before the simple command of “making disciples of all nations” (Matt. 28:19). And I believe the devil uses good things to hinder us from spreading the Word as we ought.

I still have so much to learn. But for maybe the first time I can’t get enough-I want to learn all I can. I hope Tara was blessed half as much as I was by her and the experience of meeting her.

Only in America

2009-01-28T16:22:00.000-08:00

Think Social issues-what comes to mind? Mortgage issues? Layoffs? For me it's the millions of people without health insurance (including John and me). But for the government? Digital TV.

This is absolutely insane. Why is it that Dtv is now a right and privilege of being American. Everyone MUST have access to dTV.

We've all see the corny commercials where the people are watching TV and it goes fuzzy. They give lots of vague information about the switch on February 17th. But why change?

Without getting into the specifics (it's confusing) basically the Federal Communications Commission states that "it will free up parts of the valuable broadcast spectrum for public safety communications (such as police, fire departments, and rescue squads). Also, some of the spectrum will be auctioned to companies that will be able to provide consumers with more advanced wireless services (such as wireless broadband)".

Of course "consumers also benefit because digital broadcasting allows stations to offer improved picture and sound quality, and digital is much more efficient than analog" (http://www.dtv.gov/consumercorner.html)--oh yeah, I'm sure there's no underlying reason to all of this. Someone is making out.

Again though-why is this so important that the government has spent millions on advertising while other important organizations (such as the libraries, schools and health care) struggle?

And not only is the government out of whack-they are totally unable to do something right.

President Obama "earlier this month called for the transition date to be postponed after the Commerce Department hit a $1.34 billion funding limit for government coupons that consumers may use to help pay for digital TV converter boxes.
The National Telecommunications and Information Administration is now sending out new coupons only as older, unredeemed ones expire and free up more money. The NTIA had nearly 2.6 million coupon requests on a waiting list as of last Wednesday". (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/01/27/senate-oks-4month-delay-t_n_161129.html)
The switch is to be delayed about 4 months.

I can't believe they set aside $1.34 BILLION for this crap! And that's only for the stupid boxes you'll need-it doesn't include advertising or extra staffing for support representatives.

What I love is that they delayed this whole cockamamie switch because people wouldn't be ready-therefore people wouldn't have TV. NO TV? WHAT WILL WE DO? Read a book? Play a game? Take a walk? No! We cannot subject people to a life of no TV! The government can't bear the thought of it's citizens not having a TV to watch.

What will we have left if TV is gone?

AND in addition to how stupid this whole thing is - once you have the box, it sucks. The reception is terrible. You miss approximately 4 seconds of a show every 2 minutes.
You constantly have to move the box around and there have been reports that you will even lose up to 4 channels. Many (about 70%) will have to install a more powerful antenna outside (which are not able to be bought with the $40 coupon from the government).

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/01/20/AR2009012004015.html?sid=ST2009012004133&s_pos=

The more I read about it and the more I think about it, the more disappointed I become. What a time to live in. We need a smaller government-not one that dictates that we all need DTV. Maybe people like having rabbit ears or a wire hanger to get their reception. What works for some doesn't work for everyone. I wonder what they'll poke their nose into next?

I pray Christ comes back to take us to Heaven- before the switch.

Perspective

2009-01-20T12:10:00.000-08:00

I was thinking today about politics (I wonder why) and "religion". I feel so sad when Christians set their morals and ethics aside in the name of a political party. How many Christians have taken a stance for "gay rights"? How many Christians have become "pro choice"? And these are just the tips of the ice berg. So many issues that if Jesus were in the room-people would not be so quick to support.

When we die-remember, no one will stand in front of the President and say what he did for their party. We will not stand before Congress or our State representative, or even have to say what our political affiliation is. It will not matter at all. This world is NOT our home.

We are not here to bring justice. We are here to bring those who do not yet know the saving Grace of Christ-into his family.

When we die, we WILL stand before God the Father-and we will be held accountable for every action we've committed, and every cause we've supported.

Let's be sure to remember not to let our political views shadow our hearts. It doesn't matter if a gay man can add his partner onto his health insurance policy--it matters where they will go when they die-and we need to make sure we're doing everything possible to bring others to Christ.

Let's pray for President Obama. Let's pray for the salvation of those in leadership of this "great" country.

I don't mean to be cynical- I just want to remind everyone, including myself where we must set our sights.

I just need gloves

2009-01-16T16:46:00.000-08:00

So today I went to Target to get a few things. In the past 2 months I've lost 2 pairs of gloves so I figured I better stock up with all this cold weather being here.

So I check all the usual places for such items but I couldn't seem to find any. I ask a sales associate--she told me "oh we had them out in July", JULY!? She then explained that they set out merchandise a season early so people can get prepared.

I don't know about you but during the 85 degree weather of July I didn't exactly think to pull out my winter items to take an inventory of them.

So now during 10 degree weather, I have one pair of gloves left.
Is it just me or is that a very inefficient way to set out products. It is the most asinine thing I've heard all year!

So as I walked away muttering to myself I passed racks full of bathing suits. I know I'm sure not going to be trying on any string bikini's in the dead of winter when all this holiday weight is still hanging on!

In my opinion, Target really misses the mark with this.

Of peace on earth, good-will to men!

2008-12-18T21:15:00.000-08:00

Image via WikipediaWhile listening to the radio today, I heard about Henry Wadsworth Longfellow and he really intrigued me. I ended up researching him more and he has quite the story.

Henry Longfellow was an American poet during the 1800s, he has written many amazing poems, some of which were put to music and are still popular songs today. While many biographies I saw focused on his works and scholarly life, I think an amazing part and trial in this man's life came in his elder years.

In 1861, when Henry was 54 years old, his wife Fanny died tragically. Henry was taking a nap in his study, while Fanny was in the next room cutting their daughter Edith's hair and saving the locks in an envelope. While heating up sealing wax for the envelope Fanny's dress caught fire and she was engulfed in flames. She died the next day. After a futile effort to put the fire out with a small rug, Henry wrapped his arms around Fanny, badly burning his hands, arms and face. To hide his facial scars he eventually grew out the beard like you see in the picture.

In August, a month after Fanny's death, Henry voiced his despair in a letter to her sister in which he wrote:
"How I am alive after what my eyes have seen, I know not. I am at least patient, if not resigned; and thank God hourly - as I have from the beginning - for the beautiful life we led together, and that I loved her more and more to the end."

On Christmas 1861, Henry wrote in his journal:
"How inexpressibly sad are all holidays."

Then in July on the anniversary of Fanny's death he wrote:
"I can make no record of these days. Better leave them wrapped in silence. Perhaps someday God will give me peace.""

Christmas 1862 he journal simply read:
"A merry Christmas' say the children, but that is no more for me."

On December 1, 1963 Henry received word that his son Charles who had been fighting in the civil war, had been shot in the back and seriously injured. There was no entry for Christmas day 1963.

On Christmas day 1864, Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote these words.

I heard the bells on Christmas Day
Their old, familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet
The words repeat
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!

And thought how, as the day had come,
The belfries of all Christendom
Had rolled along
The unbroken song
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!

Till, ringing, singing on its way,
The world revolved from night to day,
A voice, a chime,
A chant sublime
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!

Then from each black, accursed mouth
The cannon thundered in the South,
And with the sound
The carols drowned
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!

It was as if an earthquake rent
The hearth-stones of a continent,
And made forlorn
The households born
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!

And in despair I bowed my head;
"There is no peace on earth," I said:
"For hate is strong,
And mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good-will to men!"

Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
"God is not dead; nor doth he sleep!
The Wrong shall fail,
The Right prevail,
With peace on earth, good-will to men!"

In that last verse he seems to show hope, his faith in God, and the peace he asked God for a year earlier.

"God is not dead; nor doth he sleep!
The Wrong shall fail,
The Right prevail,
With peace on earth, good-will to men!"

What better message of optimism could we have for this Christmas season.

Listen to the song here.

-John

It's E-Z

2008-12-10T06:23:00.000-08:00

Everyone’s done it. You approach a toll booth but you aren’t close enough. So not only do you have to open your door a crack to grab a ticket or stick half your body out the window to grab a ticket, but now people are honking because you’re taking too long. And all of this after you waited in line for 5 minutes.

Not me! I smile as I fly through the E-Z pass lane. Gotta love those express E-Z pass lanes where you really don’t even have to slow down to that absurd 5 mph limit.

Here’s what I don’t get. For ONCE, the powers that be actually do something to ease the frustrations of the local roadways and bridges, and people don’t take them up on it. Guess they’d rather complain. I’m all about making my life easier and trust me, this does just that!

I mean really-there are exits designated for E-Z Pass customers only (Take Virginia Drive on the TP for example)!

I’ve heard all the “excuses”. I can’t it ---there are several options. John and I have chosen to have our account replenished automatically, which is in the amount of $75, but that probably only happens every 6 months or so. There are several other payment options. Such as manual replenishment-when the light is yellow when you pass through, you know it’s time to log into your account or call them up and make a payment (minimum balances do apply).

Yes, there is a $3 yearly annual fee. Wow, what a bank buster. “1. A one-time deposit of $25, plus a $3 non-refundable annual service fee, is required for each assigned E-ZPass transponder. If a form of automatic account replenishment is chosen, the deposit is waived. The deposit will be refunded to you, if you return the E-ZPass transponder in good working condition. No interest will be paid on account balances or deposits. Paper account statements are available for a monthly fee.” (from the E-Z pass website)

http://www.paturnpike.com/ezpass/personalfaq.htm#paymentmethods

Here’s another one-I don’t use the TP enough. But from the same lips that speak that, I hear “I don’t’ have enough time for …”. Ok….well why would anyone EVER want to wait in line for a ticket then wait in line to pay when you could just cruise through? And if you’re like me, cash isn’t usually handy. I pay with a debit card for a $2 coffee when I go through Dunkin Donuts! I had one experience where I didn’t have enough change and that was it. I signed up the next day for E-Z pass.

I even had a teacher in college who said she didn’t want it because they can tell if you speed based on the times you entered and exited the toll road. Oh come on!!! If I haven’t gotten a ticket via my E-Z Pass transponder yet, you won’t either.

So save yourself the embarrassment of sticking yourself through your window, and get E-Z Pass.

Although I don’t recommend actually mounting it to the windshield…too tempting for thieves walking by. I have mine in my console and grab it out, hold it up and wisk through the toll while everyone else is stuck bumper to bumper.

Complete information available at: http://www.paturnpike.com/ezpass/ezpassINTRO.htm

Not So Good Samaritans

2008-12-01T20:00:00.000-08:00

Over the weekend I was sick and didn't get to read much of the news. I did notice however that a Wal-Mart worker was trampled to death at the opening of their Black Friday sale. Today, having recovered fully, I read a follow up article that just verified what everyone already knew, the cause of death was in fact "asphyxiation related to his trampling".

What I should have expected, but for some reason didn't, was that people seem to want to point some of the blame on Wal-Mart. Reports are that about 2000 people "had to step over or around him or unfortunately on him to get into the Wal-Mart store". Thousands of people just walked by. In the parable of the Good Samaritan, the third person to walk by finally helped and the man lived. We've spiraled out of control. Thousands of people walked over and around this man and did nothing. Even after a man was declared dead and over the PA system people were told to leave, they continued shopping, yelling back "I've been on line since yesterday morning".

I don't know about you but nothing gets me in the Christmas spirit like hearing that thousands of your fellow Americans trampled a man to death while trying to save a few bucks on a gift for a loved one in commemoration of our Lord and Savior's birth. We have become a selfish and self-centered people. The fact that anyone would try to place any amount of blame on Wal-Mart for this is beyond me. Take it from me; I’ve done my fair share of blaming Wal-Mart in the past, and this is not Wal-Mart’s fault.

We need to get close with our God. That is the only answer I can come up with, and it’s the only one we really need. We need to realize that we aren’t the type of people that step on someone, look away, or go on shopping when someone has been trampled to death. That is not what God made us to be.

-John

Disappointed by Chuck E.

2008-11-28T17:29:00.000-08:00

I have one memory of being at Chuck E. Cheese--I was very young and don't remember much about it so I didn't have much to go on. Last year John took Russell there along with a friend (John's, not Russell's!). They had a super great time, so when we wanted to do something fun tonight-to Chuck E.'s it was!

To say the least, I was disappointed. I asked myself (and John) a few times whether or not any of the games or rides were ever cleaned. Everything seemed to have a layer of snotty, germ infested grime on it. I would think that in a place where kids are coming and going by the droves, they'd be wiping that place down furiously with the most anti bacterial stuff available each and every night. It probably didn't help that the place was so warm they were practically inviting diseases to set up camp and breed. Gross!

Several of the machines either didn't work at all, or didn't give us the tickets we worked so hard to earn. The picture that comes with the Chuck E. Cheese car ride chopped John's head off. John and I both tried the virtual jump rope-and it was broken (or we sucked at it, but I'm pretty sure it was broken). Come on! We needed those tickets! Give me my tickets!

Kids were walking around with NO shoes!? Chicken bones laying around on the floor, and I'm pretty sure the Parmesan cheese for the pizza had been sitting there for at least one year.

AND no Chuck E. WHERE was Chuck E.? Shouldn't he be walking around giving high fives and butt slaps to kids? (oh wait, I think that's just in football).

But all in all- it was a good time with the kids. I showed some kids who was boss on the skee-ball game and John won the jack pot on some color game--and at the end of the night we walked away with a mini dinosaur skeleton, a small rubbery bug, a plastic hair barrette and 3 sheets of stickers.

Eggplant Issues??

2008-11-26T10:34:00.000-08:00

WHAT the heck is eggplant issues?? Well originally we wanted to call our "blog" Cactus Corner---but IT WAS TAKEN! How did someone else come up with that I ask you? So then we tried-the Cacti Corner, taken. Then came nook and cranny-taken. So we tried the plant idea again (mine) and out came eggplant issues! John is calling it Egg Plan Tissues.

For some reason I thought it would be fun to blog-John jumped right on the bandwagon and talked me into it-stating all the pros of putting all your personal opinions on the internet. John and I are both pretty opinionated and have a wonderfully entertaining life (*not) that we thought could be interesting for all.

I'm sure we'll update regularly with a menagerie of topics from politics, to marriage, to parenting and beyond!

-Debbie